Bless Our Broken Road
by SCLindseySC
Summary: Sonny Corinthos has just finalized what he swears will be his final divorce from Carly and is now free to pursue the woman he really loves, the mother of his daughters. There is just one small problem with that-she hates him. Or does she?
1. Chapter 1: Is It Getting Better?

**Chapter 1: Is It Getting Better?**

October 18, 2007

Alexis gasped and then stood in the uncomfortable silence that followed. She needed to say something, but what was she supposed to say? "You want me to go to Brenda Barrett's wedding with you?" Restating what someone else had just said worked when she lost her train of thought in court. Plus sometimes that approach even earned points with the jury if they had also lost track of the witness' rambling.

"It was just a thought, Lex, but I understand you know if you already had plans with Baldwin or something," Sonny said.

Alexis noted that he sounded nervous. _He dealt with the five families, but he had issue asking her on a date? That didn't even compute logically._ But then the rest of the thought occurred to Alexis. _Sonny Corinthos was asking her on a date?_ Suddenly there just didn't seem to be enough air in the room.

XXXXXXXX

Sonny Corinthos watched the woman he loved hyperventilate as he pulled a paper bag from the inside breast pocket of his suit. He hated to admit it but that was a little trick he had picked up from Ned Ashton. Alexis claimed Ned had never loved her, she had never loved him, their marriage had been nothing more, or less, than a sham to keep his daughter away from him.

He should hate her for that. He had probably hated women for less, but they weren't Alexis, and he couldn't. He wrapped an arm around her as she grasped for the paper bag and held it to her face. "Come on, let's sit down. You've obviously had a rough day and I didn't mean to upset you further."

XXXXXXXX

 _No, of course, he never meant to upset her further he just seemed to have impeccable timing,_ Alexis thought as she tried to slow her breathing. She supposed it wasn't really Sonny's fault that John Quartermaine had told her he didn't have complete proof but there were hints Ric hadn't really died in Canada ten months earlier.

 _Hints? What were hints? Didn't John understand that she had just started to wrap her head around how she would explain to Molly that her father had been a sick man? Didn't he understand that conversation would be less painful if Ric wasn't still around as exhibit A? Well actually she was pretty sure John Quartermaine wouldn't understand that because he only reproduced with sane people, like his wife Abby._

 _It must be nice,_ Alexis thought. She took another shaky and deep breath and glanced over at Sonny who flashed her one of his dimpled smiles. Alexis looked back down at her paper bag. He had to know those dimples got her every time. She was sure he did that was why he used them.

Sonny squeezed her hand. "There, that's better, much better."

 _Was it?_ Alexis wasn't sure because quite honestly, she thought she was almost as confused as she had been five months earlier the night she had come home and found Sonny in her town house. Sometimes she still regretted that she hadn't had him arrested for breaking and entering.

 _May 23, 2007_

 _When she pulled into the carport outside her unit, Alexis Davis saw a familiar SUV in guest parking. Sonny was the last person she wanted to deal with but with her luck he had sent Viola home and put the girls to bed, and everything would be perfect for them to finish their earlier conversation. But it wouldn't be because Alexis had no desire to finish that conversation._

 _After two exasperated sighs, Alexis took a deep breath, grabbed her briefcase and started up the steps to her front door. When she opened the door she found Sonny, as expected, looking quite comfortable while he sat on the couch with Molly asleep in his arms. In that moment, she truly wished that Molly was his. Sure, she had kept one child from him for over three years; and there were a lot of days, including the one she was facing, when she wished that they didn't have a link through a child. Or she wanted to wish that, but she never could quite because wishing it meant wishing Kristina away and she would never do that._

 _Yet, when it came down to it, Sonny was a good father and she wished Molly could have that. But Molly couldn't have that because, in spite of Ric's infidelity with Skye Chandler, Anna Devane, FBI agent Reese Marshall, and even a girl he thought was his stepdaughter, Alexis had not broken her marriage vows. Yet, in that moment, as she watched Molly sleep in Sonny's arms she wished that she had. Or perhaps she should have just wished that she hadn't gotten pregnant, but it was impossible to do that once Molly existed._

 _Sonny lifted his eyes from the child in his arms. "I think she's asleep again," he whispered._

 _"It appears that way," Alexis said as she started to reach for her daughter._

 _Sonny stood with the child still in his arms and wrapped his arm more securely around her. "I'll take her upstairs, Viola had put her down, but she woke up screaming."_

 _Alexis followed him to Molly's room and watched as he laid the baby down in the crib gently and pulled the coverlet back over her. He was very good with her and he really didn't have to be. Technically Molly was his niece, at least biologically even if Sonny couldn't consider Ric a brother after everything that had happened between them._

 _Molly had been barely a year old when Ric had fled the country to avoid prosecution in late 2006. He had died a few months after that in an accident in Canada. After Ric's death Sonny had started to spend more time with Molly and started to include her in most of his outings with Kristina. Alexis hadn't fought it because it felt more right than most of the decisions she had made where Molly was concerned. Somehow even when she had heard Molly call Sonny Dada she hadn't corrected. When Molly was older Alexis knew she would have to explain the truth about Ric, but she figured Molly could have maybe at least a few years of innocence. Or she could hope for that._

 _"Why are you here?" Alexis asked as they crept out of Molly's room._

 _"I came to say goodnight to my daughters," Sonny said as he flashed one of his dimpled smiles._

 _"Molly isn't your daughter. If you acknowledged Ric as your brother then she would be your niece," Alexis said._

 _"Molly and I share a blood connection; she has Adela's chin. I don't have to acknowledge Ric to claim Molly anymore than you have to acknowledge Stavros to claim Nikolas," Sonny said._

 _His logic was interesting but accurate Alexis decided as they came back down into the living room._

 _"So, you look a little better than you did earlier. Have you eaten dinner yet?"_

 _Alexis hesitated to respond. The answer was no, perhaps ironic since she and Scott had met at Kelly's Diner, but she hadn't been hungry. Still, she was tempted to just lie to Sonny, and possibly warm the plate she knew Viola would have left in the refrigerator. "No," she finally said shakily._

 _"Well you're in luck because I brought some of Kristina's favorite soup. I'll warm it up for you," Sonny said. He was in the kitchen before she could object._

 _Alexis sunk down into her couch and buried her head in her hands. What was she doing? The truth was that she still had feelings for Sonny she wasn't sure they had ever gone away. Her marriage to Ned had been completely in name only. Four years of celibacy had done neither of them any favors she supposed. At least Ned had been smart enough to not marry the next person that came his way-Nikolas' vile ex-wife, Lydia Karenin. She had married Ric Lansing who made Lydia look like a saint. But she supposed her marriage to Ric had been as agenda driven as her marriage to Ned, just another approach to keeping Sonny from his child._

 _It had failed though. At least Ned had been honorable, and Ned had been a very good father, he just wasn't Kristina's father. Of course, Kristina didn't fully understand that. She understood that Sonny was her father and she loved him, but she still missed Ned. Those feelings had become stronger recently. Alexis suspected it was because Brooke was back, and Kristina had seen her with Ned. From Kristina's perspective it was unfair that Brooke got to have both Ned and Sonny and she only got Sonny. She had really created a disaster Alexis thought with shame as Sonny came back into the living room with a soup bowl._

 _"You really didn't have to make me soup," Alexis said._

 _"I made it for Kristina, but I think there is more than she will be able to eat before it starts growing something," Sonny said._

 _"Well maybe if you didn't always make enough for a, not so small, army that wouldn't happen," Alexis said. She did however, take a bite of the soup, tomato with tortellini._

 _"Well tell that to Gloria."_

 _"Who is Gloria?" Alexis asked. She winced and chided herself for asking; Sonny's personal life was really none of her business._

 _"Gloria Cerullo…Lois' smom," Sonny said._

 _"Oh, right, so how is Lois?"_

 _"She's worried about Brooke. Ashton isn't exactly being reasonable about things."_

 _"Well he is her father."_

 _"Yes, and maybe he's trying but it seems too convenient that Brooke is living with him and now suddenly wants nothing to do with her mother."_

 _"I don't think Ned would turn her against Lois. It's probably more of a novelty thing. Kristina was sort of that way with you at first," Alexis said. She decided not to point out that Kristina still missed Ned. She knew that wouldn't go over well with Sonny._

 _"It isn't the same thing. Ned knew he was Brooke's father he just chose to forget that for ten years."_

 _"Yes, Sonny, and I understand you still haven't forgiven me."_

 _"Lex, please. You were afraid, I get that, and I forgive you. Do you forgive me?"_

 _"Forgive you for what?"_

 _"For Kristina and too many other mistakes to name."_

 _Alexis hesitated again. She knew that he was speaking about her sister not their daughter when he said Kristina. Kristina Cassadine, Kristina's namesake. Sonny took responsibility for her death. Heck Alexis had demanded he do so but the blame wasn't all his she had her own share. She didn't forgive herself. Yet, she almost thought she forgave Sonny._

 _Sonny dropped his head in the uncomfortable silence. "I'm sorry, that wasn't fair. Forget I said that," he said._

 _"I forgive you, Sonny."_

 _"Thank you. I don't deserve it, but things are going to change. Just be patient with me," Sonny said. "Are you sick, Lex?"_

 _"Sick?"_

 _"Well, I've been thinking about what you said earlier."_

 _"I'm not ill. I just got some bad news about a friend."_

 _"It must be pretty bad news if you were that upset."_

 _"It could be, I guess it depends on your perspective on things somewhat," Alexis said._

 _Sonny scrubbed his hand across his face, clenching his chin and jaw. "I still don't understand, but I guess that is the point."_

 _"Other people have a right to privacy, Sonny. You're just going to have to accept that."_

 _"Yeah, yeah, ok. So, this friend, is it someone Kristina knows?"_

 _Kristina did know Kyle. Quite well in fact, although at least part of that was because Kyle was her brothers Michael and Morgan's uncle. Alexis really hadn't thought of Sonny's connection before, but it was there. For that reason, one might argue he had a right to know but that didn't mean it was Alexis' place to tell him. "Yes," Alexis eventually said._

 _"Does she understand what is happening?"_

 _"Not really, it's complicated."_

 _"She's a smart little girl, Alexis. She's going to pick up on your stress and pain."_

 _"It's just complicated, Sonny. Please just drop it."_

 _"I'm not trying to pry into your life Alexis. I'm just worried about my daughter."_

 _Alexis wasn't sure if she did believe that, because in spite of having never completely returned her feelings Sonny had never really stepped out of her life. He had stepped back when Carly tried to kill herself and ended up in Shady Brook. Somehow, he carried guilt, that Alexis was sure wasn't his, for that incident, and Carly used that guilt, as she always did, and when she was worried that might not be enough she pulled out her best weapon, Michael. There were many people she could have gone to when Michael's biological father Marcus Taggert filed for sole custody. Her mother might have been logical, even her friend Jason Morgan might have been reasonable since in a way Jason's lies, and Jason's ex-girlfriend Robin Scorpio's truth had set the whole situation in motion. But Carly went to Sonny who was determined to rescue her and somehow Carly maintained custody. Alexis didn't even want to think about how much money he had paid some judge for things to go Carly's way._

 _If Alexis was honest, she had still loved him then. She was frustrated by Carly's machinations and the way that Sonny fell for them. She had asked Ned to claim her child by then, but it wasn't to punish Sonny, as Carly had suggested. It was because Sonny had been ambushed by Sorel's men while with Michael and Carly and there was no way she would put her child in that situation._

 _"So, you're really just worried about Kristina?" Alexis asked._

 _"I am, but I'm worried about you too, Lex. You know we used to be friends. We used to talk about what was important. I know I've made a lot of mistakes, but I'd really like us to be friends again."_

 _"I've made mistakes too," Alexis conceded._

 _"So, does this mean we can be friends?"_

 _"We can try I guess. It's better for Kristina if we get along."_

 _"I agree, better for Molly too," Sonny added._

 _"You're very good with her," Alexis said not ready to be completely honest._

 _"Well, you know it almost feels like she should be my daughter. I know she's not biologically but she's Kristina's sister and we do have a blood connection. More of a blood connection than I have with Michael I suppose. I should probably leave before you change your mind. I have a meeting at Michael's school in the morning anyway," Sonny said._

 _"You know you really are a good father Sonny. I'm sorry I didn't realize that earlier," Alexis said getting up to walk him to the door._

 _Sonny flashed her another dimpled smile and turned back to wave as he started down her front steps. She forced a smile back and then closed the door and collapsed against it. What was she doing? Unable to face her thoughts Alexis turned on the radio softly looking for distraction._

 **Is it getting better?**  
 **Or do you feel the same?**  
 **Will it make it easier on you now?**  
 **You got someone to blame**  
 **You say**

 **One love**  
 **One life**  
 **When it's one need**  
 **In the night**  
 **One love**  
 **We get to share it**  
 **Leaves you baby if you**  
 **Don't care for it**

 **Did I disappoint you?**  
 **Or leave a bad taste in your mouth?**  
 **You act like you never had love**  
 **And you want me to go without**  
 **Well it's**

 **Too late**  
 **Tonight**  
 **To drag the past out into the light**  
 **We're one, but we're not the same**  
 **We get to**  
 **Carry each other**  
 **Carry each other**  
 **One**

 _Listening to the song's opening strains Alexis realized that distraction was not going to be hers. If anything, the song just made her think of Sonny. Of the connection they still had, that they maybe always would. It wasn't just a connection through Kristina though, it wasn't that simple. She should have turned the radio off or switched the station but somehow, she couldn't. So, she just went back to the couch and sunk down again head in her hands._

 **Have you come here for forgiveness?**  
 **Have you come to raise the dead?**  
 **Have you come here to play Jesus?**  
 **To the lepers in your head**

 **Did I ask too much?**  
 **More than a lot.**  
 **You gave me nothing,**  
 **Now it's all I got**  
 **We're one**  
 **But we're not the same**  
 **Well we**  
 **Hurt each other**  
 **Then we do it again**  
 **You say**  
 **Love is a temple**  
 **Love a higher law**  
 **Love is a temple**  
 **Love the higher law**  
 **You ask me to enter**  
 **But then you make me crawl**  
 **And I can't be holding on**  
 **To what you got**  
 **When all you got is hurt**

 **One love**  
 **One blood**  
 **One life**  
 **You got to do what you should**  
 **One life**  
 **With each other**  
 **Sisters**  
 **Brothers**  
 **One life**  
 **But we're not the same**  
 **We get to**  
 **Carry each other**  
 **Carry each other**

 **One**

 **One**

 _What was she doing? Alexis had no idea._

Five months later, with strains of the song still ringing in her mind, Alexis still wasn't sure she had any idea what she was doing. They spent time together, lots of time together. Kristina saw her father every day so usually that meant that Alexis saw Sonny every day. They were cordial, in fact Alexis supposed maybe they had even accomplished co-parenting with style. Apparently, that was one of her ex-husband Ned Ashton's goals. He hadn't told her that, she had overheard him discussing it with his mother at the Nurses' Ball.

He had then sung a touching song to his daughter. Or what Alexis had heard had been touching. Kristina had, launched into a bit of a temper tantrum and they had needed to leave early. _How was she supposed to explain to Kristina that Brooke Lynn had been Ned's daughter first and she had every right to have her father in her life? Brooke Lynn's mother had never lied about who her father was. Alexis had for three very long years and somehow things might never be the same._

After one more slower breath Alexis removed the paper bag from her face and passed it back to Sonny.

Sonny flashed another dimpled smile. "No, that's ok, you can keep it. I have more at home.

Alexis was sure he did. She doubted they were backups in case Kristina forgot to bring her lunch box if she slept over on a school night. _So, what did that mean?_


	2. Chapter 2: Apples and Oranges

**Chapter 2: Apples and Oranges**

Sonny wished he could read her mind. He wished he knew what thoughts were swirling behind her brown eyes. Maybe she just didn't want to go to Brenda's wedding. Yeah if he said that out loud his psychiatrist would probably wonder if his medications needed further adjustment. It wasn't going to Brenda's wedding it was going somewhere with him.

Maybe his medications did need further adjustment, because he had clearly been living in a fantasy world. Somehow, at least in his mind, he had been convinced that bringing Alexis to Brenda's wedding was the perfect plan. When he had realized that letting go of Brenda and Carly might leave him free to find love, he hadn't been able to admit to himself that it was Alexis he had been looking for. Yet, he could see it had been. So, bringing her to Brenda's wedding had seemed like the perfect completion of the circle. Or not he guessed.

He thought back to that fateful conversation with Brenda. It had been a few days before Lulu Spencer's Junior Prom. Brenda had volunteered them to help outfit Lulu and Spinelli. Sonny had gone along with it for Brenda. Or maybe he had gone along with it mostly for Brenda. After all, Lulu was Luke Spencer's daughter. At one point, he and Luke had been friends and business partners. Things had gone downhill from there, that seemed to be a theme in his relationships Sonny realized. Even so, even if Luke had helped give Faith the opportunity to kidnap his kids and things would never really be the same, Sonny hadn't been able to forget the past as if it had never happened. So he would help his old friend Luke Spencer's daughter. He had just wished that Luke Spencer's daughter could have selected to love someone other than Spinelli.

 _May 23, 2007_

 _"_ _Thanks! Well I better get Lulu because we need to get going," Brenda said as she stood up from the bench they were sitting on in the cobblestone courtyard of Port Charles Crossing._

 _"_ _Where are you going?" Sonny asked._

 _"_ _To Temptations…"_

 _"_ _Temptations?"_

 _Brenda's eyes sparkled as she spoke. She really seemed happy and Sonny wanted to be happy for her. "It's Lucy Coe's dress line. I'm going to find Lulu something that hasn't been released yet. No one else will have it that way."_

 _Sonny raised an eyebrow. "Lucy is going along with this?" he asked. He wouldn't have expected that, but he supposed people could change. He wanted to it was just figuring out how to actually do that which was the hard part._

 _"_ _Well you know she and Luke were partners in his club for awhile," Brenda said._

 _"_ _Yeah, and Luke nearly killed her, or at least complained to anyone in ear shot that he wanted to repeatedly multiple times. Plus, there was that whole issue with Damian Smith," Sonny said._

 _"_ _Ok well maybe I made a little deal with Lucy," Brenda admitted._

 _"_ _Am I going to like this?"_

 _"_ _Well more than I am I think," Brenda said._

 _"_ _What are you promising her?"_

 _"_ _Oh, I might have agreed to do a photo shoot for her Temptation line," Brenda said._

 _"_ _You do realize that your old pal Jax owns part of that company with her," Sonny said._

 _Brenda sat down again. "Well, yes, but he still owns part of Deception Cosmetics too and I do work for them and just avoid him. Anyway, if Jax has a problem then it's his problem. He actually did me a favor because I would have married him, Sonny," she said._

 _"_ _I know," Sonny said._

 _"_ _Of course, you know. You were on the other end of the kiss, you know it was a kiss goodbye."_

 _"_ _I'm sorry for what part Carly played in that," Sonny said._

 _"_ _Don't be, if I had married Jax I never would have had the opportunity with Cruz. Don't be mad, but I love him," Brenda said._

 _"_ _I'm starting to see that. Which probably means us being seen together isn't a great thing," Sonny said._

 _"_ _It's ok, Cruz knows we're friends and he deals," Brenda said with a smile. "Anyway, Carly already tried to convince him I was sleeping with Jason. She failed, but she tried."_

 _"_ _With Jason?" Sonny asked. He wanted Brenda to be happy, but he wasn't sure that Brenda being happy with Jason was something he could ever really wrap his mind around. Perhaps his feelings were unjustified; especially since he had slept with Carly who he was starting to see Jason might love. He liked to think he had no clue that Jason had any feelings for Carly then; after all Jason had been still dating Robin Scorpio when Carly and Sonny had what he supposed could best be described as "hate sex". Sonny shook his head, could he be any more messed up?_

 _"_ _I'm not sleeping with Jason. Carly just wanted Cruz to think that."_

 _"_ _Right, of course," Sonny said as he tried to hide the relief that flooded through his veins._

 _"_ _Well you better go finish outfitting Mr. Spinelli. I'm supposed to meet Lucy before five," Brenda said as she stood again._

 _"_ _Have Johnny take you, I'll have Mike give Milo, Spinelli, and I a ride later," Sonny said._

 _"_ _Thanks," Brenda said and then she flashed him the smile that made it all worth it. She took a few steps forward and then turned back to face Sonny. "Maybe we can all have dinner at Kelly's later?" she suggested._

 _"_ _You probably should spend some time with Cruz," Sonny said. Normally if he said that it would be laced with bitterness, but there wasn't bitterness._

 _"_ _Cruz is working tonight, I don't mean to make you feel like my second choice though."_

 _"_ _We're apples and oranges baby," Sonny said._

 _Brenda laughed. "Good analogy, I'll call you when we're done," she said. She flashed another smile and opened the door to After Eight to collect Lulu._

 _Sonny stood outside for another moment watching her and Lulu walk towards the parking lot outside the perimeter of the enclosed outdoor mall. Where exactly his last line had come from he had no idea. It was almost impulsive and free, sort of like where he had been years ago. Maybe it was a sign of better things to come. Maybe letting go of Brenda and Carly left him free to find love again._

He thought he remembered that conversation, and the feelings it evoked, so vividly because that was the day he had felt hope for the first time in a long time. That had been the day that Alexis had told him she forgave him. But maybe forgiveness wasn't enough. Maybe it wasn't just Brenda and Carly he had to let go, but Alexis as well. He wasn't sure he could do that though.

Before he could really finish that thought he heard a familiar squeal as Kristina came through the door and across the living room into his arms. "Hey, princess, how was school?"

Kristina smiled at him, oblivious to what she might have interrupted. "We learned about multiplication. Oh, but the classroom rabbit doesn't like Max. He bit him."

Sonny glanced over at Kristina's personal guard, Max Giambetti. He looked more embarrassed than angry. Sometimes Sonny envied Max's inner calm, as Lois would have called it. Supposedly his lamictal was supposed to help him find his own inner calm. "Are you alright?" he finally asked Max.

"Oh, yeah, it was just a little nip and all my shots are up to date," Max said.

"Yeah, that annual company physical is good for that," Sonny said.

Alexis rolled her eyes. Sonny wondered if she was annoyed with his attempt at humor or if it was him.

"Kristina, go upstairs and brush your teeth you have a dentist's appointment in thirty minutes," Alexis said.

Kristina pouted. "Didn't we go to the dentist already this year?"

"Yes, in April, it is now October. You're supposed to have your teeth cleaned every six months. Now, scoot!" Alexis said.

"Daddy!" Kristina whined.

"Your mother is right, go brush your teeth," Sonny said.

Kristina stuck her bottom lip out a little more but then she turned and went up the stairs to the upper level of the townhouse.

"Thank you," Alexis said.

"Why are you thanking me? She has to know she can't play us against each other. Anyway, I want her to have nice teeth," Sonny said.

"You know, I'm going to go wait in the car," Max said. He was out the door before either Alexis or Sonny could say anything more.

"So, about this wedding?" Alexis asked.

"Yes?" Sonny asked with trepidation.

Another uncomfortable silence enveloped them. Just as Alexis opened her mouth, Kristina bounded back down the stairs and back into his arms.

Sonny smiled at his daughter. He didn't know what else to do and it wasn't her fault that her parents couldn't seem to get things together. "Are your teeth all brushed?"

"Yes!" Kristina said, then she flashed him a very broad dimpled smile to prove it.

Sonny pulled his daughter close to him and kissed the top of her head. "I love you, Krissy, always remember that." Maybe Carly wasn't the only woman he needed to figure out how to platonically co parent with.

It was different with Alexis though. At first, he thought it was because she didn't hate him and she acknowledged he tried to be a good father. Life would be so much easier if Carly could get there. It wasn't just that though, he loved Alexis. Honestly, he wasn't sure if he had ever loved Carly. He had thought he had, he had wanted to at different times, but he wasn't sure he ever had. In retrospect, he was pretty certain that, in the spring of 1999, when Carly burst into his penthouse and found him making love to Alexis that his fling had met the woman he was falling in love with. Alexis hadn't been the fling though.

But Carly had attempted suicide after she walked in on them and guilt had pulled him back in. Alexis hadn't discouraged him. He had thought she was being noble, maybe she just wasn't that into him.

"Are you coming to the dentist with us?" Kristina asked.

Sonny could hear the hope in her voice. It broke his heart.

"No, your father has a meeting he has to get to. You can call him later and let him know how your checkup went and you're going to spend the night at his house tomorrow," Alexis said quickly.

He didn't have a meeting to get to _._ He didn't have anything planned. He'd probably go home and have dinner with Lois and reflect on the irony that maybe if both of them were less stubborn, or more willing to take a few risks to follow their heart, that Ned and Alexis never would have had a sham marriage and maybe all four of them, and their respective children, might be a little less broken.

Sonny debated challenging Alexis but decided not to. He had used Michael and Morgan to try to pull Carly back in when she'd left him for Jax. He had vowed to never do that again and he wouldn't use Kristina or Molly to pull Alexis back to him. Maybe he just had to accept that she was never his to begin with. In his heart he knew that even lamictal and trileptal wouldn't get him there though.

Sonny gave his daughter one final hug, then released her and stood. "Bring your appetite tomorrow night because I'm making your favorite," he said as he started across the room to the front door.

"Lasagna?" Kristina squealed.

Sonny smiled. "Of course, only the best for my princesses," he said. Then he went out the door before he had to admit that the plural hadn't just referred to Kristina and Molly.


	3. Chapter 3: The Consequences of Our Past

**Chapter 3: The Consequences of Our Past**

When she opened the door to Dr. Raymond's Office Alexis saw a familiar face and cringed. As she hesitated Kristina must have followed her mother's eyes because she pushed past her mother, ran across the waiting room, and catapulted herself into his arms. Alexis winced at the scene. Any other rational mother would lecture their seven-year-old daughter on the impropriety of literally throwing herself at a stranger. Alexis wanted to do that too, but she couldn't.

Ned Ashton might have become a stranger, but he hadn't started out that way, at least not in Kristina's life. He had been the one who brought Kristina home from the hospital while Alexis was still trying to pull things together. She spent more time in the hospital recovering from anemia and exhaustion than her premature daughter spent in the NICU. He had done the two am feedings when Kristina's wails pulled Alexis from her nightmares of the past and the last person in the world she could face was her own daughter. He had been the first person Kristina called Dada. Kristina had said Dada weeks before Mama and that had stung. It had been ironic in a way, Kristina had been expressing her resentment at being kept from her father long before she really understood. Alexis had regretted that, but there hadn't been another choice. Or at least she had convinced herself of that in the moment.

Ned looked a bit stunned at the child that had landed in his lap. Yet, he shifted in his chair slightly and seemed to recover. "Hello, Kristina," he said.

Ned spoke very softly. Of course, he always had with Kristina. It was some reverse psychology thing; he thought if he practically whispered she would stop her tantrum to hear him. It had sounded absurd. Alexis had told him as much. But it had worked.

Ned glanced in Alexis' direction. "So, I guess you still use Dr. Raymond as your dentist," he said.

Alexis nodded. "Kristina likes him."

Kristina shook her head. "I don't like him. You make me come," she said. She shifted on Ned's lap to face him more. "But I would have come today if I had known you were going to be here," she said with a smile.

"It is good to see you again, Kristina. You have gotten so big," Ned said.

"Maybe the next time I have dinner with Grandma you can come," Kristina said.

Ned didn't say anything at first. Eventually he said, "maybe."

Alexis cringed. Kristina was so desperate to have Ned in her life. Yet, just like Alexis had made the choices that brought Ned into Kristina's life in the first place, Alexis had made the choices that pulled him out of it instantaneously. That conversation still haunted her over four years later.

 _September 9, 2003_

 _"_ _I wish you had told me you were going to do this," Ned said as he stood at the end of Kristina's hospital bed. His tone was full of frustration although his words were barely above a whisper as he didn't want to wake Kristina._

 _"_ _I was just trying to save my daughter," Alexis said. Ned would never understand but it really was that simple for her._

 _"_ _I know," Ned said quietly. He exhaled audibly. "Don't give up hope yet. We aren't going to lose her, we'll figure something out. Like Dr. Hogan said random donors are just reality for a lot of kids, even kids with full siblings. We just need to get more people tested and we will find a match for Kristina."_

 _"_ _Sonny wants custody."_

 _"_ _I'm sure he does. Listen, don't worry about that. I'll handle it. Kristina is our daughter…"_

 _Alexis cut him off. "You can't fix this, Ned, so just go. Please, just leave! Even your family fortune and ELQ connections can't make this go away!"_

 _Ned tried to reach for her hand. Alexis pulled away and turned away from him. "Just leave us alone, Ned!"_

 _"_ _Alexis, I understand that you are stressed but lashing out at me is not helping. I'm not going anywhere. I'm not going to abandon my daughter."_

 _Alexis laughed bitterly. "Well there is your first mistake, Ned. See the problem is she never was yours, Ned. Now, please just leave me alone with my daughter so I can figure this out."_

 _Alexis saw the pain in his eyes. She watched as he gently kissed Kristina's head one final time before he turned and walked out the door._

Alexis had handled it. She and Ned divorced, and she married Ric Lansing. She had done what she needed to, to save her daughter. Only it hadn't. Sonny's illegitimate premature daughter's stem cells saved Kristina's life and Sonny's mercy allowed Alexis to maintain custody. Ric really hadn't done anything except make the situation worse. Alexis hadn't seen that at the time though.

"Kristina Corinthos," Dr. Raymond's dental hygienist called from the edge of the waiting room.

Alexis forced herself to focus on the present rather than her continual nightmares of the past. "Yes," she said then she turned and extend her hand to Kristina. "Come on, Kristina, we don't want to keep Dr. Raymond waiting."

"If I don't have any cavities can we go to dinner with Daddy Ned?" Kristina asked but she made no move to climb down from Ned's lap.

"I'm sure Ned has other things he needs to do," Alexis said. She willed Ned not to speak. She supposed that was unfair. It was very unfair since she had criticized Ned in the past for not being more involved in Kristina's life. Yet, she couldn't face all of the past at once and her conversation with John Quartermaine, ironically Ned's uncle, was still echoing through her mind. Dinner with Ned and Brooke was just not an option.

Kristina crossed her arms across her little chest. "You always decide everyone has other plans. You decided daddy did too. You just want to ruin all of my fun."

Alexis glanced over at the hygienist who had started to tap her foot impatiently. "Kristina Adele Davis-Corinthos if you have a temper tantrum here then that will tell me you aren't old enough to go out to dinner with your Granpapa alone on Sunday evening. Is that what you hope to accomplish here?"

Kristina didn't answer her. She turned away from her and climbed out of Ned's lap on the other side away from Alexis. Then she marched across the waiting room. "I'm a big girl, I don't need my mother to come back with me," she said.

As Kristina disappeared with the hygienist Alexis sunk down into a chair and buried her head in her hands. Some people just shouldn't be parents and as she sat there she wasn't sure she wasn't one of them. Her choices certainly hadn't made her daughters' lives easier. That much Alexis was certain of. So many moments forced her to see and face that chilling reality but one moment in particular came back to her. It had been the day of the art show at Kristina's school. It should have been a happy day but as Alexis had driven from the courthouse to St. Catherine's Academy anything but happy thoughts had filled her head.

 _April 25, 2007_

 _Alexis pulled into the parking lot at St. Catherine's Academy and parked. Kristina had attended St. Catherine's for only a little over a year as she had initially attended her regular zoned elementary school which was on the Port Charles High School Campus. Sonny had worried that there wasn't sufficient protection at public school and Alexis had caved about halfway through kindergarten and allowed Kristina to transfer. Alexis supposed she should be grateful to Sonny for paying tuition for Kristina to attend a private catholic school but if she had her choice she would move to the Lilac Park neighborhood and have Kristina attend Lilac Park Elementary. That was where Kristina's friend and pseudo cousin Nicole Quartermaine attended. If Kristina had never gotten sick and she had stayed in her marriage of convenience with Ned it was where Kristina would have attended as well. Perhaps that was why Sonny had been so adamant about private Catholic school._

 _Alexis was surprised to see Emily Quartermaine get out of the car in the next parking space. She did remember that Kristina had mentioned her art show to Emily when they had run into her at the coffee shop, but Alexis hadn't planned on Emily actually coming._

 _"_ _Hi Alexis, how is your day going?" Emily asked when she fell in step with her as they walked across the parking lot to the school._

 _Emily's cheeriness was often more than Alexis could take. Sometimes she wondered if it was just because it reminded her of Emily's cousin Chloe. "I've had better days," Alexis said flatly._

 _"_ _I'm sorry. I truly don't mean to pry but if there's anything you want to talk about," Emily offered._

 _"_ _No, but thanks for the offer. Kristina will be thrilled that you came," Alexis said as she adeptly changed the conversation._

 _"_ _Well I had NRP this morning, but we got out in plenty of time for me to have lunch with Matt and Ellen and still make it here. I was going to bring Nicole but she's at piano lessons this afternoon and then she and grandfather are leaving to go watch Katelyn run at Penn Relays. Mom is on call tonight and dad is tomorrow, so they couldn't make it. I'm taking my ACLS recertification tomorrow or I would have gone with them," Emily explained._

 _"_ _Well that's nice," Alexis said blandly. She really had no idea what Emily was really talking about._

 _"_ _Theoretically grandfather is going so someone can chauffeur Kate and Nicole to the pool to get in their morning swim workout. But in reality, Penn Relays is totally his scene," Emily said with a smile._

 _"_ _I've never been," Alexis said as they walked up the walk in front of the school._

 _"_ _I ran there in high school and then college. The atmosphere is amazing; the crowd is electric, so grandfather and his bullhorn level cheering fit right in. I think he wanted to bring Kristina this year actually," Emily said._

 _"_ _Well there was no way Sonny was letting Edward take his daughter out of state. Maybe she can go to one of Kate's other meets," Alexis suggested._

 _"_ _Yes, I kind of figured that. Just remember we all love Kristina even if she isn't Ned's biological child," Emily said following Alexis into the school._

 _"_ _I know, and I appreciate the way that you all have been considerate of Kristina's feelings. I only wish Ned could be so considerate. I know he isn't really Kristina's father but since I made the mistake of keeping that secret for almost four years I understand why Kristina formed a bond. I suppose it's really all my fault. But I can't make Ned see that he's not just punishing me he's punishing Kristina and she's just a scared little girl," Alexis said as tears formed in her eyes._

 _Emily led her over to some chairs in the lobby and guided her to a chair. "We all make kind of naïve choices sometimes, Alexis. The problem is we can't go back and have a redo. I think Ned is still grieving his loss. I'm not excusing his behavior but I'm praying that he'll find the strength to let Kristina back in some time," Emily said._

 _"_ _Kristina didn't die though, he doesn't have to grieve anything," Alexis said._

 _"_ _His relationship with Kristina changed and, well, Ned isn't the best at handling change from my experience," Emily said._

 _"_ _But that doesn't make it any easier for Kristina. Three years later she still does grieve what she lost. Perhaps it would be easier for her to take if Ned had died, but she still sees him around town sometimes so she knows he still exists. I'm sorry that came out all wrong," Alexis said._

 _"_ _No, I kind of understand, I mean not about Ned dying, but how his absence just rubs more salt in the wound," Emily said._

 _"_ _Exactly, I just wanted something so much better for Kristina than the dysfunctional family I grew up in. But I ruined it I fathered a child with a wonderful man who just happened to also be a criminal. I was afraid, so I lied and denounced her true father. Then as if ruining one child wasn't enough I married a truly evil man and had a child with him," Alexis said as her words were replaced by sobs._

 _"_ _Alexis, you didn't know what Ric was really like when you married him. A lot of people were surprised by who he really was. You have two beautiful little girls and they have a lot of people in their lives who love them and a mom who would go to the ends of the Earth for either of them. They're going to come out on the other side," Emily said._

 _Emily's words jolted her back to reality and Alexis was immediately embarrassed by her breakdown. Emily would claim they were family, and perhaps in some sense they were. Emily had dated Alexis' nephew and Alexis had married her cousin. But explaining that marriage was nothing she could do._

 _Alexis dabbed at her eyes with some Kleenex from her purse and attempted to regain composure. "We better get to the gym for Kristina's art show. I'm not sure if Sonny was going to be able to make it and if Kristina is there without anyone then she won't handle that well," Alexis said as she stood._

 _"_ _Well I mentioned it to grandfather. I think he was going to try to stop by in between meetings," Emily said._

 _When they entered the gym, they saw Kristina standing with Sonny. Alexis ignored the fact that Max and Milo were attempting to blend in with the crowd. Kristina laughed at something Sonny had said and he scooped her up into his arms. As they turned around Kristina caught sight of her mother and Emily. Sonny put her down and she ran to them. Emily and Alexis both took an arm and they all rejoined Sonny._

 _"_ _Guess what Mommy? Granpapa came!" Kristina squealed. Granpapa was what Kristina had called Edward when she was younger and couldn't get out great grandfather. The name had stuck though, and Kristina's Christmas gifts had still carried tags proclaiming they were from Granpapa four months earlier._

 _"_ _Unfortunately, Eddie couldn't stay long. He had a meeting to get to. He sends his regards," Sonny informed her._

 _"_ _Well that's nice that your grandfather was able to see your art. Did he and your father manage to play nicely?" Alexis asked._

 _"_ _You don't think Eddie and I can just have a nice conversation? Do you think I am a ruffian?" Sonny asked before he flashed Alexis a dimpled smile._

 _"_ _Well the last time that you and Edward were together Kristina put you both in time out," Alexis pointed out._

 _"_ _Well Eddie got longer than I did," Sonny said indignantly._

 _Kristina giggled._

 _"_ _Well the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends only one minute per year of age," Emily said with a laugh. Her laugh faded a little as she saw Nikolas Cassidine entering the gym._

 _Kristina noticed Nikolas too and squealed with pleasure "You came!" she said as Nikolas joined them._

 _"_ _Of course, I did, I told you I would," Nikolas began. "You are looking beautiful as always, Emily," he added._

 _Emily blushed a little at the praise. "Thank you, Nikolas," she said. Then she turned to Kristina and bent down. "So, would you like to give me the guided tour and show me your art?" she asked._

 _"_ _Yes!" Kristina said as she happily took Emily's hand and started across the gym._

 _After they left, Nikolas continued to glance longingly. "Emily is so great with kids. She is going to be such a great pediatrician. I have always said that."_

 _Alexis decided not to point out to her nephew that he had been the one trying to talk Emily out of going off to medical school at Columbia and felt it would have been better for her to have joined Elizabeth in the nursing program at PCU._

 _"_ _You don't think she will be?" Nikolas challenged his aunt and Sonny._

 _"_ _I'm sure Emily will be very talented as a pediatrician she's smart and she cares that's a big part of it I would think," Sonny agreed._

 _"_ _Well I know she is going to be wonderful. As I was telling Alan PCGH is fortunate to have her. I am just glad she has come back home, and we have another chance to make our relationship work," Nikolas said._

 _"_ _Well I agree that Emily will become an asset to PCGH but, Nikolas, darling, she's engaged to marry Patrick," Alexis said._

 _"_ _Engagements don't always lead to weddings, Alexis. Dr. Drake does not love and cherish her the way I could," Nikolas said._

 _They were saved from further comment on Nikolas' pipe dreams when his cell phone began to ring. "I better take this, it might be a hospital emergency," Nikolas said, and he stepped away from them to take the call._

 _Alexis inhaled deeply and then exhaled. "I thought he was finally starting to accept Emily's impending marriage I guess I was wrong."_

 _"_ _Well sometimes it's hard to give up your soul mate," Sonny said._

 _"_ _I don't really see that Emily is Nikolas' soul mate. I think it's more of a crutch for Nikolas to avoid other relationships," Alexis said._

 _"_ _Perhaps," Sonny said noncommittally._

 _"_ _Anyway, enough about Nikolas, seriously, please tell me that Edward is actually unharmed at his meeting," she joked._

 _"_ _Trust me, Lex, he's fine. He came, he admired Kristina's art. He mentioned that Alan and Monica have opened the pool and invited Kristina and Molly over to swim. I pointed out that Kristina and Molly were not born with fins like Nicole and Katelyn seem to have been. He pointed out that Alan, Monica, and Emily are all doctors and Katelyn is now a certified lifeguard. Then he realized he had a meeting at three, so he said goodbye to Kristina and left. Actually, probably about ten minutes before you and Emily walked in," Sonny said smiling._

 _"_ _Wait so you and Edward had a civil conversation. What is the world coming to?" Alexis joked._

 _"_ _You're telling me, Ashton actually apologized to me this morning," Sonny said._

 _"_ _Ned apologized? For what?" Alexis asked uneasily._

 _"_ _Well basically he said he could accept that I loved Brooke and he'd try to not interfere in our relationship as long as I didn't put her in danger," Sonny said._

 _"_ _So, does that mean Ned has custody now?" Alexis asked._

 _"_ _Yes, I won't say I think that is the right thing," Sonny admitted._

 _"_ _Well I'm sure it wasn't an easy decision for Judge Ward. So, does that mean that Lois is sticking around in Port Charles?"_

 _"_ _She's not going to leave her daughter, Alexis!"_

 _"_ _I'm sorry I didn't mean to imply that. Listen this whole thing isn't easy for me. Don't you think I don't feel guilty for taking Brooke's daddy away?"_

 _"_ _Ned made his own choices long before you got involved. You didn't break up their marriage. Ned did that all on his own."_

 _It was true that Alexis had barely known Ned when he and Lois divorced. She wasn't sure she had ever met Lois before Kristina was sick. She also knew a lot of things about Ned and Lois' marriage that she doubted Sonny did. Some of that was her Cassadine nature, she had manipulated Ned's grief and guilt and used it to get him to claim her child. Ironically, although he shouldn't have, at one point Ned had trusted her enough to share a few things as well_

 _"_ _I guess it wasn't a hospital emergency," Alexis observed when Nikolas rejoined them._

 _"_ _No, it was Liz. She seems to forget that I am not Lucky's keeper," Nikolas said a little miffed._

 _Alexis had no interest in staying on the topic of Lucky especially since he currently had more criminal charges pending. "Are you still going to that risk management seminar this weekend?" she asked an attempt at topic change._

 _"_ _Yes, I fly out Friday morning, I may invite Emily," Nikolas said._

 _Alexis didn't get the chance to remind him that Emily was probably too busy planning her wedding to Patrick to go on vacation with him because Kristina and Emily appeared at their side._

 _"_ _I had a lot of fun, Kristina, but I have a few errands to take care of before dinner so I'm going to go," Emily said as she embraced the little girl._

 _"_ _Thank you for coming, ok who wants the next tour?" Kristina asked gleefully._

 _"_ _Why don't you let Nikolas go next?" Alexis suggested. Nikolas scowled at his aunt but didn't want to disappoint his cousin, so he did go with Kristina who skipped off and happily dragged him along._

 _"_ _Nice save there, counselor," Sonny said after Nikolas was out of earshot._

 _"_ _Well I figured Emily deserved a smooth exit," Alexis quipped._

 _"_ _Speaking of exits, what are your plans after this is over?" Sonny asked._

 _Alexis wavered was he going to invite her to dinner? She supposed it made sense and Kristina would love it if the three of them had dinner together, but Alexis knew that if she did that she was unwrapping her heart again and that scared her._

 _"_ _I have a lot of work to do tonight," Alexis said._

 _"_ _I was just asking because Kristina has been missing Mike, so I was thinking maybe we could all have dinner tonight, the five of us," Sonny suggested._

 _"_ _Five?"_

 _"_ _You, me, Mike, Kristina and Molly. Anyway, you have to eat at some point, right?" Sonny said. He smiled and flashed his should be illegal dimples._

 _"_ _Well I suppose you're right I do need to eat, and Kristina has been clamoring for lasagna since the last time she was at your house. I can barely boil water, so you know I can't make that and the stuff from a box doesn't fool her," Alexis said._

 _"_ _I could make some and you could put it in the freezer and just pull it out to bake, you could do that," Sonny suggested._

 _"_ _Thank you but tonight Kristina can have both her lasagna and her daddy which is what I think she wanted anyway," Alexis said._

 _"_ _You know how important she is to me," Sonny said._

 _"_ _Yes, I do, and I'm sorry that you missed out on the first almost four years of her life. I've been thinking, she's really old enough now that she could spend the night at your house one extra night a week. I wanted to ask you about it though before I told Kristina," Alexis said._

 _"_ _I would love that, Lex, thanks!" Sonny said as he picked Alexis up in the excitement._

The truth was that Alexis still shuddered when she thought about her conversation with Emily from six months earlier. However, she did think that Kristina and Sonny's relationship had only deepened over the same period. That was positive. Kristina felt mostly secure in her father's love. Yet, she still hadn't let go of Ned completely. Alexis could see that as much as she had tried to ignore it. She had faced Sonny for Kristina maybe she had to face Ned too. Facing Ned should be easier, she had never loved him. Yet, it was much harder because facing Ned required her to really face all the pieces of her past and her relationship with Sonny, not just the ones she could handle. That was what she wasn't sure she could do. But maybe she had to do it for both Kristinas.


	4. Chapter 4: That Was Then, This Is Now

**Chapter 4: That Was Then, This Is Now**

As she slowly raised her head from her hands Alexis realized that Ned was still sitting two seats over. He glanced over at her and she saw the concern in his eyes. Ned had never loved her, but he had always cared. Even after she ripped out his heart and trampled on it he had cared. It was just what he did, and Alexis knew she should be appreciative but most of the time she just felt guilty.

"I was just about to go through Brooke's backpack and see if she had a paper bag," Ned joked.

"Careful, that might be considered illegal search and seizure," Alexis retorted.

"Well, honestly, I've done worse and if I thought I needed to I'd do it again. It is far better to have your child alive and angry at you for not trusting them than dead because you trusted them when you shouldn't have."

Ned's honesty surprised her, and Alexis spoke without thinking. "I thought Sonny said Brooke never even experimented with drugs." After the words were out Alexis regretted them. She wondered if Ned's wince was because Sonny was talking to other people about his daughter. She supposed it was also a bit ironic that at one time Ned had known Kristina much better than Sonny did and perhaps even currently Sonny knew Brooke better than Ned did. Or maybe he didn't, maybe Sonny had been wrong, and that was why Ned had winced.

"She didn't, but in my opinion even experimentation isn't harmless. Experimentation can, and sometimes does, kill," Ned said.

Alexis wondered if he was referring to Hayley Beck's death. She didn't like to think about that because she couldn't imagine the pain Stephanie Beck must have felt to lose a second child. She wondered if she had tried to have her younger daughter, Alexis thought her name was Kerri, encased in bullet proof bubble wrap and kept forever on a leash. Alexis wanted to do that with Kristina and Molly and she had never buried a child.

There was another reason Alexis didn't like to think about Hayley Beck's death because it required her to really think about how, and why, Hayley's father had died. But Ned Ashton was the last person she wanted to discuss PCPD Officer Brian Beck's death with for numerous reasons. Since she couldn't face most of the reasons, Alexis focused on the fact that Ned's cousin, Jason Morgan, had been tried for the crime.

The trial had gotten national coverage. A double cop homicide, an alleged perpetrator who not only had once been a cop as well but had ties to both the mafia and a Fortune 500 Company were fodder for lots of sensational headlines. Ultimately Diane Miller, a woman both Ned and Ric had known in law school, spun reasonable doubt as if her life depended on it and Jason had been acquitted of the murders of Officer Brian Beck and Detective Andy Capelli. Ric had held a press conference after the verdict to pontificate about the travesty of justice that had occurred. He had suggested there had been jury tampering and vowed that his office would find the truth and Jason Morgan would be retried. He waxed on that the process itself was not flawed but that humans were. He closed with an expression of sympathy to Brian Beck's widow and daughters and vowed that he would bring Brian's killer to justice.

When Ric had made the speech in June 2004, Alexis had considered it little more than a pompous political move. It was an election year, as DA's only did two-year terms in Chapparal County then, and Ric needed to shift the blame away from himself. But more than three years later, Alexis knew Ric's role in Brian Beck and Andy Capelli's death, perhaps that had just been a pompous political move too.

"Alexis?" Ned's voice intruded into her thoughts and Alexis realized he had moved over and was sitting beside her. "You don't look so well," he said.

"I'm fine, Ned," Alexis snapped back. She didn't want his sympathy and she didn't deserve his empathy.

Alexis saw the familiar way Ned's eyes raised at her retort. She knew that look too well and knew that he didn't believe her. She cringed as her mind took her back to an earlier time while she had been pregnant with Kristina.

 _November 24, 1999_

 _Alexis Davis stared up at the ceiling of her hospital room with boredom. "Ned, you hate criminal law. Just because your grandfather seems to feel that supporting your pregnant wife is worthy of compensation as the ELQ attorney without you actually having to, oh I don't know provide some legal advice to justify that compensation doesn't mean that you're meant to fill in for me at the DA's Office. Now give me back that case file!"_

 _Ned didn't hand over the case file. "I'll have you know that I originally considered criminal law. I clerked for a US attorney the summer in between my second and third years of law school.I'm sure we could work out something with DA Mitchell for me to help you with some research or something," he said._

 _"Wasn't she your aunt?" Alexis asked._

 _"Well, yes, she still is my aunt. You met Abby at our wedding remember Riley, the ring bearer, that is her youngest son with my Uncle John."_

 _Alexis did remember Abigail Donely Quartermaine, she was a little hard to forget. She was all polished and perfect with her perfect husband and two perfect little boys. Alexis was sure she hadn't used guilt to trap John in a marriage of convenience like she had done to Ned. "I don't need your help!"_

 _Alexis saw the way Ned's eyes raised at her outburst, but he was too polite to call her on it. She didn't need his help, yet she had basically demanded he claim her child as his. She just hadn't realized the full consequences of her demand. She hadn't realized her attempt to save her child would kill her sister. "I'm sorry," was all Alexis managed to get out before the tears came back._

 _"Hey, it was a horrible accident but it's not your fault," Ned said as he sat down on the edge of the bed, took her into his arms, and started to rub her back._

 _As his hands glided across her back Alexis wondered if he really believed his own words. Did he really not believe that her actions had killed her sister? Or was he just concerned that if she got too upset the contractions might start again. He worried that work was too stressful, and stress was bad for the baby, but Ned Ashton wasn't a stupid man. He had to know that just remembering what had happened in July was more stressful than any case she might be assigned by the DA's Office._

 _"I don't blame you, Alexis," Ned whispered as he released her._

 _Maybe he really didn't, but that didn't mean it wasn't her fault. Alexis heard the soft squeak of the door opening and turned to see her obstetrician, Dr. Meadows._

 _Ned glanced across the room with concern. "Is something wrong?"_

 _"Actually, I come bringing good news. You know I told you we would only continue the drugs to stop your labor for forty-eight hours and now that you've gone more than another twenty four hours without any contractions since we've stopped the medicine I should be able to discharge you in the morning. You will be able to have Thanksgiving dinner with your family after all," Dr. Meadows said. She finished with a smile, obviously unaware of exactly what she was suggesting._

 _"That's great! Isn't that great, Alexis? Grandmother will be so thrilled," Ned said_

 _Alexis looked at her husband as if he had really lost it. She didn't think it was coincidental at all that her pre-term labor had started during one of those blasted Quartermaine Sunday Brunches. Was Ned insane? If Sunday brunch could induce preterm labor Thanksgiving dinner would probably bring precipitous delivery or something. He wanted her to resign from the DA's Office but family dinners with his family were ok? That wasn't even halfway logical. Or maybe she had really lost it. The Quartermaines were loud and opinionated but she could see they did love Ned. They had loved her sister too, probably because Ned loved her. They probably even thought they loved her. Yet, their love just stressed Alexis and made her feel like even more of a fraud. She wasn't really pregnant with the newest Quartermaine heir. "I can't wait," Alexis finally managed weakly._

 _So, she had gone to Thanksgiving dinner at Alan and Monica's mansion, and listened to their traditional singing grace about gathering together. That part had been painful because she was quite sure that the Lord wouldn't bless any of the choices she had made in the preceding year. Dessert had been more painful, Lila had made the Key Lime Pie that Ned had assured her was Alexis' favorite. Alexis did like Key Lime Pie and Lila's pie was good, but she hadn't been able to enjoy it. The Quartermaines had presumed that of course since Ned loved her and knew everything about her he would know what kind of pie she liked. But he didn't and honestly hadn't. However, Ned was savvy. He knew of all his family's welcoming tactics. He had asked all the right questions and committed the information to memory._

"I'm sorry about Kristina. I'm sure the past year hasn't been very easy for her," Ned said.

Alexis laughed bitterly. "That is an understatement," she said.

"Kids can be resilient with the right support though. I do believe that. I have to, I guess I can't face the other alternative," Ned said.

Alexis knew that his words outwardly referred to Brooke Lynn, but he was including Kristina in the context. He did care about her, and Alexis felt ashamed for doubting if he did before. "I would let you see Kristina," she said.

"I know, but Kristina has two parents and I think that they both need to be comfortable with the people in her life. Maybe what I'm doing isn't right either but as things are right now the costs of me being in her life seem to exceed the benefits," Ned said.

"We're talking about a seven-year-old not an ELQ investment," Alexis said.

"For the record, my cost-benefit analysis was for Kristina's purposes. I miss her, I still think of her often, but having a relationship with me isn't worth her sacrificing her relationship with her father."

Alexis had forgotten how methodical and logical Ned tended to be. Outwardly he didn't seem to be. He had married Lois Cerullo and he would have married Alexis's sister. He took on the stage name Eddie Maine and performed in leather pants.

"It isn't that I didn't love Kristina enough to fight Sonny. It is that, when I really thought about it, I realized that Kristina needed her father, and that wasn't me."

"Ned, I'm sorry…"

Ned interrupted her. "You were correct though. Grandmother always said we didn't get to define God's plan only follow it. Now, I'm not completely sure I always see everything that happens as God's plan. There is a place for free will and the reality that we're all pretty imperfect most of the time. But I do think that Kristina knowing her father loves her doesn't go against God's plan."

"Did you apologize to Sonny and let him see Brooke because you hoped he would do the same with Kristina?" Alexis asked.

"I wouldn't use my daughter that way, not even for Kristina. I accepted that Brooke had strongly attached and bonded to Sonny and that severing any attachment, even one I'm not completely comfortable with, would hurt her. None of the past year has been very easy for her either."

Alexis was sure it hadn't been. She was saved from further comment though when Brooke Lynn returned to the waiting room.

"Ok, so no cavities, my wisdom teeth seem to be ok, and we're going to be late to meet Allison and Mackenzie, so I told Dr. Raymond if you had other questions you would call him in the morning or something," Brooke said as she reached for her backpack and slung it over her left shoulder.

Ned turned to Alexis. "If you need something you can always call me. Within reason I'll go along with whatever Sonny comes up with," he said.

Alexis caught the wary glance that crossed Brooke Lynn's face.

"Go along with whatever Uncle Sonny comes up with about what?" Brooke Lynn asked.

Alexis wondered if Ned had ever explained to his daughter about the details of their marriage. With a shudder she wondered if Lois had.

"This is about Kristina, right?" Brooke asked when neither of them answered her original question.

A new thought struck Alexis. She knew Kristina was a little jealous of Brooke's presence in Ned's life. _Was Brooke also jealous that Kristina had lived with Ned longer than she had?_ Alexis supposed that if she had been a better wife or stepmother she would have figured out how to convince Lois to let Ned see his daughter. But, honestly, neither Ned or Brooke's welfare had really been her concern. She supposed that was ironic and hypocritical since she had taken advantage of Ned's grief over Brooke's little sister to convince him to go along with her plan. Perhaps if she hadn't done that Ned and Lois would have figured out how to work through their grief.

"Kristina might come and have dinner with us some night," Ned said.

"That would be ok, she likes artichokes too. We could make that salad I like, and you could eat around the artichokes," Brooke suggested.

"Maybe we could," Ned said. However, Alexis noted that he didn't sound much more convinced than he had when talking to Kristina earlier. She suspected that had very little to do with his distaste for artichokes.

XXXXXXXX

After Ned and Brooke had departed, Alexis continued to agonize over the path she had taken. She recalled the night that she had gone to see Ned at ELQ and coerced him to claim her child. Perhaps subconsciously she had known that her actions would unleash a trail of death and destruction and that was why the entire exchange was seared into her memory.

 _June 22, 1999_

 _Alexis Davis was a woman on a mission as she took the ELQ elevator to the executive level. She knew what she was about to do was not without consequences, but she couldn't even begin to think of them._

 _As she stepped off the elevator she turned left. It was the opposite direction from her sister Kristina's office, but she wasn't looking for Kristina. In fact, she knew that Kristina would be out of town until Thursday. She had gone with Edward to some meeting in DC. Kristina's trip had dictated the timeframe for Alexis' plan._

 _When she reached Ned's office, she saw that, as expected his secretary had already left for the afternoon. Yet, Ned still appeared hard at work. That was hardly a surprise, old habits died hard and with Kristina out of town there was no incentive for him to change. Alexis rapped lightly on Ned's open door and waited for him to look up._

 _"Alexis, hi, I guess Kristina forgot to mention she was leaving this afternoon for DC," Ned said._

 _"I'm not looking for Kristina, Ned, I'm looking for you," Alexis said._

 _Alexis wasn't sure exactly what emotion was flashing in Ned's eyes, perhaps fear. "I'm not sure I understand," Ned said after a long pause._

 _"I have a proposition for you," Alexis said. She chided herself internally once the words were out. Ned was going to think she was hitting on him and that was clearly not her intention. Her intention was probably worse, but she wasn't trying to seduce her sister's fiancé, or at least not into bed._

 _Ned appeared more uncomfortable as she stepped into his office, then closed, and locked, the door. As Alexis sat down in the chair opposite his desk Ned pulled his own chair back from the desk. In that moment, Alexis felt a little remorse. What she was about to do was probably going to ruin her sister's relationship, yet, she couldn't change course._

 _"You can tell Sonny that those piers that weren't for sale when he sent Jason to do his bidding still aren't for sale," Ned said._

 _Alexis supposed that Ned's guess wasn't so off the wall. She largely believed that ELQ had bought Donely Shipping a few years earlier to prevent Sonny Corinthos from doing the same. ELQ Enterprises did have a shipping division which had started as a way to export steel made from their Kemp Falls Granite Quarry. Their steel mill and their shipping hub were in Hampton Bays in the rural Northwest tip of the county. Theoretically ELQ wanted to be able to ship medical supplies on the Charles River and therefore wanted access to the Port Charles Harbor. Buying Sean Donely's old shipping company had given them, Sonny Corinthos free, access to the harbor. Alexis also knew that Sonny largely wanted Donely Shipping as an ego thing. He wanted to finally win against Edward Quartermaine. "Sonny is only part of the reason I came today. You aren't going to want to say yes to this. I shouldn't even ask; but you're the only person I can count on to help me, " Alexis said._

 _"Help you with what?"_

 _"I'm pregnant," Alexis blurted._

 _"Well congratulations! Kristina didn't mention that."_

 _"I haven't told her yet. I thought maybe we could tell her together."_

 _Ned looked perplexed. "You want me to help you tell your sister that you're pregnant. I think you're making this harder than it has to be, Alexis. You're an adult, and your sister isn't going to judge your choices."_

 _"You don't understand, Ned."_

 _"You're right, I don't," Ned said but then his expression changed. He gasped and took a deep breath before he exhaled very slowly. "You're pregnant with Sonny's child," Ned said. It was a statement not a question._

 _Alexis nodded._

 _"Well, that complicates things. If you want me to put in a good word with my mother, she's attempted to cite people for contempt for less. However, he's not exactly on her list of favorite people. Actually, he might even be on her list of least favorite people. Sometimes I think she blames him for Lois not letting Brooke see them."_

 _"That isn't what your mother really blames Sonny Corinthos for and you know that, Ned, even if you won't let yourself say the words aloud."_

 _"You mean the stuff with Jason. Well I guess Jason is an adult, or maybe he is. I don't know, sometimes I wonder about that."_

 _"I'm not talking about Jason. I'm talking about the daughter you lost," Alexis said._

 _Ned dropped his head into his hands. It had been almost three years. However, he still looked so broken that Alexis almost regretted her words; but only almost. Her words hit well below the belt, she knew that. Heck, she had intended that. She wouldn't let her child become a casualty of Sonny's world like Lily Corinthos, Lois Ashton, and Carly Spencer had._

 _Ned didn't ask her how she knew. Alexis wasn't sure if he was too overwhelmed to wonder, or even care, or if he just attributed it to her Cassadine heritage. She allowed the silence to linger for just a moment more before she spoke. "I'm sure you would have done anything to save your daughter's life, so you can understand what I must do for my own child's life. Sonny can never have any idea that this is his child."_

 _"Well, speaking from experience I'm not sure that growing up without a father is the way to go either. But I have no right to judge I suppose," Ned said._

 _"What if there was a way that my child could grow up with a different father?" Alexis asked._

 _Ned looked at her carefully for a moment. "You can't be suggesting," he began then stopped._

 _"You're the only person who could understand. Sonny's world took your child away. Don't make me pay that same price."_

 _"One child can never replace another," Ned said._

 _"No, but we could make this work," Alexis said. They could. They would have to._

 _"Alexis, this is crazy."_

 _"It's crazy enough that it will work."_

 _"You want me to claim your child while I'm engaged to your sister."_

 _"Kristina will understand, eventually," Alexis said. She would have to._

Kristina had understood, but she hadn't agreed. Kristina's efforts to tell Sonny the truth had ultimately led to her death, only a few weeks later, when Luis Alcazar blew up Sonny's warehouse. A favorite phrase of PCPD Chief John Quartermaine's ran through Alexis' head. _You don't have to pull the trigger to be a murderer._

Every time she heard those words Alexis reflected that she could blame Luis Alcazar, Sonny Corinthos, or Roy DeLucca but she was the one who had made the choices that put her sister in harm's way. One desperate choice and one coerced choice had unleashed a path of death and destruction. Often Alexis still wondered how things would have been different if she had never gone to Ned in the first place.

Ned hadn't been her first thought, Jax had been. She had thought he was her friend then, perhaps he even had been. In the end she had decided to honor that friendship and not mess up his attempts to reconcile with Brenda. She had told herself that at least. Kristina had challenged that, Kristina had said that she hadn't chosen Jax because she didn't want to push Brenda back into Sonny's arms. Admitting that Kristina had been right only made Alexis feel like more of a murderess.


	5. Chapter 5: Looking For Redemption

**Chapter 5: Looking for Redemption**

"I'd say that's more proof she doesn't really hate you," Sonny said as he reached for another clove of garlic.

Lois Cerullo exhaled with a frustrated sigh as she set her cell phone down on Sonny's kitchen table and pulled out a chair. "Ned probably told her she had to send that. He was probably holding dinner hostage until she did or something," she said.

"Maybe the first part about the no cavities but I doubt he told her she had to say she loved you."

"You didn't see the way she looked at me after Carrie's funeral. Even now I haven't looked at my Ma that way."

"Lois, she's a kid and she just buried her best friend. This can't be an easy time for her," Sonny said.

"She didn't look at you that way," Lois challenged.

Sonny supposed that was true, although that was partly because he had left immediately after Carrie Lorenzo's funeral to deal with the Michael's latest morning recess playground altercation. "I'm sorry I wasn't there," he said.

"It isn't your fault my daughter hates me. You didn't make the choices that led to that."

"Brooke doesn't hate you. Listen, Michael went through something like this a few years ago when Carly married Alcazar. Kids want their parents to stay together even if that just isn't possible," Sonny said.

Lois winced. "Me getting back together with her father is about the last thing Brookie wants."

"That wasn't what I was suggesting. Just don't let Ned paint himself as the injured party," Sonny said.

"Well that's easier said than done. I didn't tell him about those letters and I don't want to. Are you any closer to figuring that out?" Lois asked.

"No, that kid Max was concerned about I think just has a crush on your daughter. I probably did worse when I was fifteen or sixteen."

"No comment," Lois said.

"I'm touched by your restraint."

"You should be, I believe that was during your dating the Fake Coward period."

"My what?" Sonny asked.

"Connie Falconeri, that's what Spinelli calls her. Basically it's a play on Kate Howard using her given initials."

Sonny smirked in response to Lois' explanation. Finally, there was one of Spinelli's little name phrases he sort of understood.

"I thought it was one of his better ones in fact," Lois said.

"Well, in comparison to the others, yeah, sure," Sonny said as he gave his sauce another stir.

"You should give him another chance he really isn't that bad. He just sees the world a little differently."

Sonny avoided turning back around to face her. He wasn't quite sure why Lois had become Spinelli's prime defender. Maybe it was some biological Cerullo thing he would just never understand because Brooke had apparently befriended the guy too. Or maybe Lois was nice to him because he was Brooke's friend. In Sonny's opinion, he was too old to be Brooke's friend though. She had just turned thirteen, he was almost twenty. Spinelli better not have a crush on Lois' daughter. "Don't you think Spinelli is a little old to be Brooke's new best friend?" he asked.

"If she's spending time with Spinelli that is less time she's spending with Ned's over involved and overly indulgent family," Lois said pointedly.

"Ok, point taken."

"Forgive me if I don't want my daughter turned into the next Quartermaine Princess. You were at her birthday party you have to see where this is going."

Sonny wasn't completely sure he did. He still didn't trust the Quartermaines but he was starting to see that they weren't actively removing Lois from Brooke's life. Brooke wasn't actively pulling away anymore either. So, there shouldn't be a problem, but Sonny could see there was. He just had no idea what to do about it.

Brooke Lynn would never be his daughter, but she was the first little girl he had loved. Perhaps it was hypocritical that he had certainly helped Lois keep Brooke from Ned and then been indignant that Ned and Alexis had done the same thing with Kristina. It was different though, Ned had known he was Brooke Lynn's father. He hadn't known he was Kristina's. It was just different in more ways than he could explain. It really was but the more he reflected on it, the more he realized that what he had done still wasn't right.

So much he had done wasn't right. He was just unsure how to fix most of it. He hadn't realized how much he had invested in Alexis as his path to redemption until she had dismissed him earlier. Or at least he hadn't allowed himself to realize it.

XXXXXXXX

In Dr. Raymond's office, Alexis flipped through a magazine as she waited for the hygienist to finish cleaning and sealing Kristina's teeth. Fortunately, she hadn't had any cavities, so they wouldn't have to schedule another appointment for fillings. Alexis looked up from her magazine a few minutes later when she heard the door open. "Are you all set? Come grab your coat. I'm sure your sister is missing us," she said as she dropped the magazine onto the table beside her.

"You made Daddy Ned leave!" Kristina accused as she stood in the middle of the waiting room and crossed her arms across her chest. Her bottom lip was extended into the classic Cassadine pout, but it was quivering too.

Alexis saw the mixture of indignation, reproach, and pain in her daughter's dark brown eyes. Those were a lot of emotions for anyone but especially for a seven-year-old little girl and once again Alexis felt like the most pathetic possible excuse for a mother.

"He had to go, Kristina, he had plans for dinner already," Alexis said. She doubted Kristina would really accept that explanation.

Kristina's eyes got harder, darker, and colder. "Did you really invite him to come to dinner?"

 _Well she hadn't actually asked. But Brooke had mentioned Allison all on her own so Ned must really have had prior plans. Of course, he might have canceled them if she had asked._ "I'm sorry, I didn't ask but he mentioned he had to meet someone else," Alexis finally said.

Kristina did not uncross her arms. "He probably said that because you told him he had other plans. Serena says you aren't supposed to do that it's called misleading the witness and judges don't like that."

"It's called leading the witness, Kristina," Alexis said. There were certain disadvantages to letting her boss's daughter baby sit. Scott's daughter, Serena, had clearly inherited the Baldwin litigator genes; even if she swore she had no interest in _spending her time arguing_ , as she put it, and was going to do something with her life that made a difference. The last Alexis had heard she was going to become a marine biologist and save dolphins.

"That's what I said," Kristina said with frustration.

 _Well not exactly, but, misleading the witness is probably worse,_ Alexis decided."Kristina, I know you miss Ned, and I am sorry."

"If you were really sorry you would do something about it. You told daddy that before. I heard you!"

Alexis shuddered uncertain what conversation with Sonny Kristina had overheard. That was another matter she supposed to be addressed later. Preferably not in Dr. Raymond's waiting room while his nurse kept looking at her watch, Alexis decided as she picked up Kristina's jacket, stood and then draped it around her daughter's shoulders.

"Come on, Kristina, we can discuss this in the car. I think everyone is waiting for us to go home," Alexis said as she prayed that Kristina wouldn't force her to carry her away kicking and screaming. Sonny was much better at that, he had carried her away the night of the Nurses' Ball when Ned sang to Brooke.

"Can we have pizza for dinner?" Kristina asked.

"Yes," Alexis said quickly, nudged Kristina in the direction of the door, and then tried to convince herself that she wasn't doing the same thing she criticized Carly for doing. _No, she wasn't caving to avoid the tantrum that was sure to follow she was just culinarily challenged. Yes, that was it culinarily challenged. There were worse foods than pizza. Anyway, it wasn't really bribery unless money was exchanged. She would never dream of paying Kristina a dollar a minute for silence._

Max was standing by his SUV in the parking lot when they stepped outside into the October sunset. Alexis was a little surprised by this as it was after six and usually that meant the night shift guards took over. She still hated the whole concept of guards but after Kristina's kidnapping she had stopped fighting the issue. Once again, the choices she had made had deprived her daughter of any semblance of a normal life.

Kristina ran across the parking lot to Max and he scooped her into his arms. "You waited!" she squealed.

"I said I would, didn't I?" Max asked.

"Yes, yes, but…" Kristina's voice trailed off with uncertainty.

Alexis cringed at the implication of her daughter's words. Too many people had come and gone in Kristina's life for her to trust anyone she was afraid. Max Giambetti seemed like a decent, honorable man. He kept promises. Sometimes Alexis wondered how he had gotten mixed up in the mob in the first place.

"So how was the dentist?" Max asked.

"Ok, we're getting pizza. You can come," Kristina said.

"I'd like to, but I have class tonight at seven," Max said.

Alexis' ears perked up. _Max was taking a class? Was there really such a thing as mafia 101? Did he have alternative career plans? Would he even be allowed to have alternative career plans?_ "What course are you taking?" she asked.

"Communication 256-The language of adolescence. Port Charles schools won't renew coaching certificates without evidence of progress towards a degree unless you already have a bachelor's degree, which I don't."

Alexis had forgotten Max was coaching cross country at Port Charles. Sonny had only mentioned it in passing as explanation for why most afternoons Marco would be the one actually bringing Kristina home as Max had to get over to the high school for practice. Somehow Alexis had a feeling that Max's new interest in coaching wasn't really of his own volition. "Right, Stallions run fast!," Alexis said. That annoying pre-race chant was still stuck in her head. Emily Quartermaine had been a junior on Port Charles undefeated cross-country team the first autumn she had been married to Ned.

"They do, very fast, I need my mountain bike to keep up." Max joked.

"Can I come the next time?" Kristina asked.

"You mean to the next meet?" Max asked.

"No, the next time you go bike riding with Brooke and Michael," Kristina said.

Max looked a bit uncomfortable. "Umm I'm probably not taking Brooke and Michael bike riding together any time soon," he said.

Alexis had heard about that encounter as well. Michael thought bike helmets were uncool. Brooke had pointed out that brain damage was even less cool. Helmets went flying, namely Michael's at the back of Brooke Lynn's head. Tempers flared from there. Lois was understandably protective of her child. Carly was indignant that it wasn't Michael's fault, because, at least in Carly's mind, nothing was really Michael's fault. Alexis supposed it was genetic. Carly was always completely faultless in her own mind as well.

Alexis shuddered more as she recalled the Corinthos custody battle of early 2002. That had been a nightmare and a half. Not only did she have to put up with Carly on a daily basis for two months, but she had to listen to her mother in law's editorials on the importance of experience in family law at Quartermaine Sunday Brunch. The honorable Tracy Quartermaine-Grabler never came out and said that Alexis has no business representing Carly Corinthos and Alexis supposed that she tried to change the topic when she and Ned showed up at family gatherings. She didn't always succeed, but that was probably partly because her son didn't understand why Alexis had taken a leave from the DA's Office to take the case in the first place.

The tabloids still remembered that Carly's older son had once been thought be a Morgan, so they claimed it was Quartermaine influence. It wasn't, but the rumors were enough that Tracy attempted to recuse herself. Of course, then the tabloids leapt onto the story of Alexis' 1997-1998 affair with family court judge Justus Ward. Of course, Justus had actually been a criminal law attorney at that time, Alexis' co-counsel when she defended her brother Stefan against murder charges. That had been Justus' final criminal trial. He was sworn in as a family court justice three months later. Although he frequently claimed that family law was harder to stomach than criminal law on most days, and more frequently threatened to leave it all behind he still hadn't.

So, without an impartial judge to reassign the case to and Alexis' motion to block Sonny's attorney, Jordan Baines', appeal for change of venue the ball, figuratively, remained in Tracy's court. It was ironic, Alexis supposed, that she had agreed to represent Carly in exchange for Carly's silence that Sonny was Kristina's biological father. Yet, when Alexis was forced to reveal that truth herself, a little more than a year later, the original custody battle gave Jordan Baines all kinds of ammunition for the Davis-Corinthos custody battle of late 2003.

Max set Kristina back down on the parking lot pavement. "I've got to get over to CCCC or I will be late for class, Krissy. I will see you in the morning," he said. He turned back to Alexis. "Ernesto is parked right next to you," he said.

Alexis nodded acknowledgment and reached for Kristina's hand. "If you want pizza we should go before Fratelli's closes," she said. _That wasn't bribery, that was consequences-based parenting, yes, consequences-based parenting, yes, that was it indeed._

Kristina let her mother take her hand. "Bye, Max!" she called as they walked across the parking lot.

Alexis smiled. _Carly had been wrong, consequences-based parenting could work._


	6. Chapter 6: Information Overload

**Chapter 6: Information Overload**

October 19, 2007

Friday afternoon, Alexis scribbled her name at the bottom of another file and added it to the cart beside. _Only twenty more to go, woo hoo,_ she thought as she picked up another file from the stack on her desk. In spite of her complaints, she was actually grateful for the paperwork; it was just enough to distract her from her thoughts of Sonny but not enough to really force her to focus. Plus, it would give her an excuse to stay at work late and not focus on how empty her townhouse seemed when the girls were at their father's.

Sonny had taken Kristina every other weekend for over a year. Molly had started joining them more recently. Sometime after Ric's death, or perhaps that should be alleged death, Alexis realized with a pang. She scribbled a furious signature, tossed the file onto the cart with more force than necessary and forced herself to try to focus on the task ahead of her. _Thinking about Ric was not an option. It was just not an option._

Kyle Durant stood silently in the doorway to his colleague's office waiting for a good moment to interrupt. Alexis looked quite industrious, however, they had worked together for over two years; and the intensity of her scribbling simply told him that her mind was on something other than the stack of files in front of her. What he still hadn't quite mastered was how to tell if whatever she was really thinking about was something he could or should interrupt. He supposed there was always the popcorn option, maybe that was the way to go.

He had been about to go find some microwave popcorn when Alexis looked up from her desk and met his eyes. "Are you summoning your courage or something, Kyle?" she asked.

"I just didn't want to interrupt your train of thought. Scott told me to take half of those trespass and prohibited possession cases from that PCPD bust last weekend. I guess you have all of the files."

"Yes, my penance for convincing him to not make an example of his daughter. They're over there," Alexis said gesturing to a table against the wall with a stack of files.

"For what it's worth, I agree with you. I doubt she knew that wasn't soda. Of course, I don't believe that she didn't know there would be alcohol there when she decided to go."

"I don't think she ever claimed she did. She made a poor choice but technically a fifteen-year-old hanging out with other kids who are drinking but isn't drinking herself hasn't violated any applicable statutes."

"Until they turn sixteen when they can be charged with misdemeanor trespass. But New York statute doesn't allow misdemeanor charges against juvenile offenders so there is the loop hole. So even if Serena hadn't learned her lesson, or been under careful watch by her father, and ended up at the party the PCPD did bust last weekend there wouldn't be anything legally we could do," Kyle said.

"Other than count down the months until her sixteenth birthday, no. Convenient how that works isn't it?"

"Well, not if you're over fifteen like the majority of kids at that party. Did you want me to just take the top half of the stack or should we divide based on the case associated anticipated headache factor?" Kyle asked.

"These are misdemeanor cases, Kyle, this isn't rocket science."

"Yes, but our accused include the granddaughter of a state legislator, and the son and daughter of the mayor. To further complicate things said, son of mayor inadvertently gave the officers his fake ID instead of his real one, so we're supposed to be making a case with him as the supplier and pursuing twenty counts of unlawful dealing with a child against him if we can make it stick. Of course, his father, who just happens to be the Police Commissioner's boss, is trying to make this all go away, and quickly, since you know we're coming up on an election year. Our boss wishes that someone had opened his own eyes that these parties existed before his daughter ended up at one and wants whoever supplied the alcohol prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.

"Yeah, this really hasn't been Garrett and Andrea's year. Their older son, Chris, pled no contest to assault charges in Connecticut. Supposedly that was just a bar room brawl that got out of hand. Of course, public perception may be different," Alexis said.

"Plus, we have to prosecute the daughter of Chapparal County's MADD Chairwoman, Inez Lewis, who has already gone on the record that none of this would have happened if we had passed the dry county referendum in August," Kyle said.

"Oh, leave me the Callie Lewis file. I think that is definitely part of my penance. It gets better too, Serena has released Dara Jensen as her counsel but retained her for her best friend. In the future it might behoove Scott to not vent about the legal tactics of criminal defense attorneys to his daughter. She knows things I didn't know as a third year law student, and now she's teaching them to my daughter."

"Allowance negotiations aren't going well?" Kyle quipped.

"Very funny. Actually, allowance has stayed stagnant. Michael didn't lobby for a cost of living increase this year. That may be because allowance is chump change when your sister pays him a dollar a minute to be silent. Of course, his earnings are limited by her presence in his life I think she only pays for silence when she is around."

Kyle took a deep breath. There wasn't a great response to Alexis' accusation. It was true, Kyle had heard Carly say as much herself. It was another one of those topics in parenting they would never agree on. But it wasn't for him and Carly to agree because her boys were his nephews not his sons. It wasn't for Alexis to agree just because her and Carly's respective children shared the same father. A father neither woman had been married to when any of those children made their way into the world. Sometimes Kyle wondered if Alexis condemned Carly's choices so vehemently because she herself had made some of the same.

"I'm sorry that was out of line," Alexis said.

Kyle read some genuine remorse in her face. "Yes, it was. Listen, I like to think that we're friends. But Carly will always be my sister and while I may not always agree with all of the choices she makes I will always support her. This isn't really about Carly though is it? Do you want to tell me what else is bothering you?"

Alexis didn't say anything at first so Kyle tried a different approach. "Why don't you think about it? I'll be back in five minutes with popcorn and we can divide up these cases or you can tell me what's really bothering you. It's totally your choice and I won't push, ok?"

XXXXXXXX

Alexis watched Kyle's retreat from her office. Kyle Durant was about the last person she should be talking to about what was bothering her. _What was she supposed to say? I'm sorry I've just learned that my ex-husband, you know, the man who caused your sister to lose her baby, and killed your father, well, he might still be alive._

With that thought she tried, and failed, to take a deep breath as her cell phone started to ring. She scowled at it and then scowled more as she saw the name on her caller ID. _Of course, Mr. Impeccable Timing strikes again,_ she thought as she opened her phone.

"Alexis Davis, and you're calling me because?" she asked as she struggled to find enough air again.

XXXXXXXX

In his office, in Corinthos-Morgan Coffee House, Sonny Corinthos shook his head at the frustration he heard in her voice. He wondered if it was too much to hope that Baldwin was just being annoying or something. He was sure that happened a lot so that could explain things. He wanted to believe it was that, not that she had seen his name on her caller ID. "I'm calling because I wanted to know if you wanted me to pick up Molly a little early. You mentioned that Viola was going away for the weekend?" he asked. He attempted to insert some protective indifference.

He failed. In his heart he knew that but perhaps she didn't sense that. Perhaps that was actually worse. There had been a time when he had thought they shared a soul. Or he had wanted to believe that.

"Fine pick up Molly early. You know I'm a little busy here, Sonny, I can't just drop everything to renegotiate the great child exchange."

 _What? The great child exchange? What?_ Sonny shook his head. He had accepted that her mind just went to places his would never get. _He was ok with that, well, mostly._ Sonny knew he had mostly gotten through high school because Carmine Cerullo was determined he would not be the first in the family to not graduate from Sacred Heart Academy. "The great child exchange?" he finally asked aloud.

 _Ok, so her intellect kind of turned him on. Contrary to popular belief, he didn't consider women property nor was he intimidated by smart women. But what would CandyBoy know about that anyway? He was still blaming Ned Ashton for poisoning Brenda's mind against him. As if he didn't believe that Brenda could rub a few brain cells together on her own and conclude that any man who would publicly humiliate her by saying I don't in place of I do had either never loved her at all or was just a class A jerk._

Sonny voted for both but knew better than to verbalize either. _He wasn't really a completely insensitive clod._ He heard Alexis exhale in frustration. He scrubbed a hand over his face before grabbing his chin in contemplation. _Ok maybe he was insensitive because he was obviously not making things easier for her. Apparently, he had forgotten how to do that. Or maybe he had never known. Maybe their great connection had all been in his mind, and one sided at that._

"You know, Sonny, I'm trying to get work done here."

Alexis' words pulled him from his internal monologue. "Right, well I'll pick up Molly now," he said. He had been about to let go, at least of the conversation but something struck him. _She still hadn't told him what had been bothering her the day before._ "You would tell me if you were in trouble right, Lex?"

Alexis laughed yet Sonny heard more bitterness than humor and more fear than anything else. It was nothing like the laughter he had heard on the beach in Puerto Rico.

"As entertaining as this conversation is, Sonny, I do have work to do. Goodbye!" Alexis said.

Sonny grimaced at the click and silence. _Well at least she hadn't gotten frustrated enough that she just hurled her cell phone across the room to end the call._

Carly had done that, or at least before his attorney had enlightened him to the power of communicating via email. It was really working for them. Or he thought it was. Their divorce had been finalized. The custody battle, well that was another matter entirely and one he couldn't fully face all the time. He was trying though. No one was going to convince him that giving his sons to CandyBoy to raise was a good plan. After giving his chin another squeeze of contemplative anguish, he got up from his leather chair and went to go pick up his daughter, Molly.


	7. Chapter 7: The Brass Ring

**Chapter 7: The Brass Ring**

"Ride Horseys?" Molly asked expectantly as Sonny fastened her into the car seat in the back of his SUV.

There was a carousel in the Gallery Mall. It was a cheap imitation of the real thing in Sonny's opinion, but Molly wasn't picky. "You know, your Aunt Lois says that isn't a real carousel. There isn't even a brass ring," he said.

"Horseys?" Molly repeated.

 _Right, because there is more to life than brass rings. Maybe if he just kept telling himself that it would make it true. Maybe…_

"Horseys!" Molly repeated more emphatically.

"Ok, we'll go see the Horseys. But as soon as I can convince your Mama to not panic that I'm taking you outside of Chapparal County limits we're going to go see the real thing. I'll take you to Deno's just like I used to take Brooke. It's better than Disney World I promise," Sonny said as he drove through Candlewick Court and back out to Route 372.

Ric and Alexis had taken Kristina to Disney World the summer before she had turned five. He had argued that she would be too young to appreciate it. Ric had said he was just jealous that Kristina would always remember that Daddy Ric had been the first person to take her to Cinderella's Castle or on the Dumbo Ride.

It wasn't that Ric would be first to take Kristina to Disney that had bothered Sonny. He hadn't wanted to take her to Disney, but he had wanted her to understand that Deno's in Coney Island was better than anything Disney had to offer. Long before Dumbo had even existed there had been flying elephants at Deno's. _Anyway, what kind of name was Dumbo? What kind of a name was Daddy Ric?_

 _Daddy Ric,_ that name had always grated on Sonny's nerves. Heck it had been easier to hear her still calling Ashton daddy with longing in her voice than that Daddy Ric crap. He didn't blame Kristina though, she was too young to have known any better. He didn't want to blame Alexis, so he laid all that blame on Ric. It was deserved though, he was sure of that.

Ric had tried to take his child, but that wasn't all. Ric had tried to take his child just to take something away from him never thinking about how that might affect Kristina. He didn't want to think he had done that to Ned. He certainly never even suggested Brooke could call him daddy. Oh, he had shown up at school when Lois had told him that annoying Dwayne Robinson's daughter Stacy had called Brooke stupid because she didn't know that everyone had a daddy. Perhaps he should have been the bigger person and called Ned. But Ned was married to Alexis by then so that idea was even more awkward than it would have been a year earlier. Not that it would have been easy then or that Sonny could say he certainly would have done it. He probably wouldn't have even if he wanted to think he would for Brooke.

As he stopped for a light on Federal Avenue, Sonny instinctively glanced over to the courthouse. Alexis was inside there, somewhere, probably chewing on the end of her pen. He wondered if she still had to write out her opening statements on those yellow legal pads by hand. A honk from the car behind him brought Sonny out of his reverie. He saw that the light had turned green and cruised through the intersection.

XXXXXXXX

Alexis looked at the bowl of popcorn on her desk. When she had met Kyle at the door to her office with an extended stack of case files he had taken a hint. He had left the popcorn though, yet, somehow, she couldn't even bring herself to enjoy it. The truth was she didn't enjoy much but that wasn't something she could share with Kyle any more than she could explain she was upset that the man who had murdered his father might still be alive.

Alexis pushed the popcorn to the side of her desk and tried to distract herself by opening another case file. Distraction was fruitless as she felt the walls closing in on her. Alexis' thoughts raced as she struggled to find enough air in the room. _If Ric was really alive then where did that leave her? Was her name on his next bullet? More importantly was Kristina's? Was Molly safe because she really shared his blood? Would Molly grow from a sweet little girl into a cold-blooded killer like her father? Did she believe in nurture over nature? If she did then why was she letting a crime lord babysit?_

XXXXXXXX

"I walk, I walk," Molly squealed as Sonny opened the door to the Gallery Mall.

"Just a minute, Princess, I'll put you down once we get inside. People drive like maniacs in that parking lot, you've really got to be on your toes," Sonny said as they passed through the doorway. He stepped off to the side and set Molly down. He reached for her hand and started to stand fully upright as she started to run in the direction of the carousel.

It was a little impressive Sonny decided as he jogged alongside her. She wasn't even quite two and she could remember how to find the carousel which wasn't exactly a straight shot from the entrance they had come in. She was definitely Alexis' daughter but, in his heart, she was his as well.

They reached the carousel in the center of the mall and Molly smiled up at him with expectant excitement. "We only have time for two rides because we have to pick Kristina up from school," he said. Actually, the line was a lot longer than he had anticipated so they might only have time for one ride.

"Krissy likes horsies," Molly said as they joined the end of the line.

That was true, Sonny supposed. Only Kristina wanted a real living and breathing horse. The Quartermaines had a stable out in Hampton Bays. Edward wanted to buy Kristina a horse for Christmas but Alexis had said absolutely not. That had been fine with him, as far as he was concerned horses were best on a post. "Do you want your sister to ride with us on the carousel?" Sonny asked.

Molly nodded and extended her arms upward as he scooped her up. He settled her onto one hip while fumbling for his cell phone with the other hand to arrange for Marco to bring Kristina to the mall instead of the penthouse after school.

As he closed his phone Sonny was surprised to see Brenda walking towards him. This surprised him for several reasons including that the Gallery Mall wasn't exactly her kind of place, it was a little more middle class than her tastes.

"Hi! Hi Molly!" Brenda said.

"Lucy convinced you to do a live fashion exhibit in the mall?" Sonny asked.

Brenda laughed. "No, not exactly although I suppose that I can blame modeling for this trip. Did you know that Logan's Department Store sells Deception Cosmetics?"

"What?"

"Well, apparently they do. Apparently they are also personally offended that Cruz and I haven't registered there. So here I am, to register at Logan's. Cruz is supposed to meet me at the Carousel. He had to meet with Mac first though so who knows?"

"Scorpio is here in the mall? Great! My day just keeps getting worse!"

"No, they're meeting at the PCPD. You're just in general not happy to see Mac right? I mean you wouldn't be coordinating illegal activity with your daughter in your arms," Brenda said.

She sounded like she really believed that, and she was right. _So Why couldn't Alexis believe that? Did Alexis really hate him that much?_

"You're right," Sonny said quietly.

"So why was your day bad before this?" Brenda asked.

Sonny knew he couldn't even begin to explain everything with Alexis, so he just didn't bother. "Just one of those days I guess. So, what about you? Are you keeping Eddie in line?"

Brenda laughed. "Actually, he hasn't been that bad."

"So, he's only taken over complete control of your wedding?"

"He thinks that, but see I let him get distracted with all the little unimportant background details. Meanwhile the major decisions get to be mine," Brenda said with a smile.

He still loved her smile. He probably always would, yet, even talking to Brenda, he found Alexis sneaking into his thoughts. "Very smooth," he said.

"Yes, I learned from the best."

Sonny figured there were a lot of people who could fit into that title. "Emily loaned you her copy of how to survive a Quartermaine wedding?" he asked.

"Close, but not exactly. My strategy advice came from Ned. He says, when Edward isn't in a listening to the next generation mood, he and Celia get him distracted with details of projects they have all already agreed are a good thing. Meanwhile they work out the more complicated details of the new projects which are technically supposed to be in limbo and by the time they're ready for a final vote Edward has usually come around enough that if they let him save face, by not reminding him that he thought the idea originally was one of their dumbest yet, all is well. Although I think maybe he has caught on because it seems like if Ned and Celia are on the same page he usually just says well, it might not be the dumbest idea the two of you have come up with, so it might have some potential, I suppose."

"If you can't beat them join them?" Sonny asked.

"Something like that. Although Edward still owns enough of ELQ outright that he could beat them I think. It just wouldn't be good for ELQ if he did and I think he realizes that."

"He's so enlightened," Sonny quipped.

"He's getting better I think. He's lost a lot his wife, several nieces, and grandchildren. He has Brooke back though, she's his miracle."

For a moment Sonny wondered if Brenda had edited the list for his benefit. Then he realized she probably considered Jason to be Edward's grandson although technically Jason was his great nephew as Jason's grandfather, who had died young, had been Lila's brother.

"Even he and Jason are doing a little better now, that's another miracle I suppose," Brenda added.

Sometimes he wondered if Brenda blamed him for the distance between Jason and the Quartermaines. He hadn't turned Jason against them, or not really. He had just given Jason other options. It wasn't his fault Jason had taken them. Or maybe it wasn't he decided as he reflected on an earlier conversation.

 _April 25, 2007_

 _"_ _So this was good, we should do it again," Sonny stammered as he and Alexis stood in the hallway outside his penthouse._

 _"_ _Yes, maybe," Alexis started to say until the elevator doors opened and Jason stepped out._

 _"_ _Well, I need to get home. Goodnight, Goodnight, Jason," Alexis said and she was into the open elevator before Sonny could say anything more._

 _"_ _I'm sorry, man, I didn't mean to turn her into a pumpkin," Jason offered._

 _"_ _It's alright; she has court in the morning and needs her rest anyway. Kristina is spending the night so she brought some things back for her for the morning," Sonny said. He wanted to believe that Jason had interrupted something more but maybe that was just wishful thinking._

 _"_ _Ok well goodnight, man," Jason said as he opened the door to his own penthouse._

 _"_ _How is Brenda?" Sonny asked._

 _"_ _She must be feeling better, she's back to making me question turning my back on the Quartermaines," Jason quipped._

 _"_ _You didn't turn your back on them, Jason, they weren't able to accept that you were changed by the accident," Sonny defended his friend's actions._

 _"_ _Maybe, or maybe I just never gave them a chance to accept it," he finally suggested._

 _"_ _Don't do this to yourself. I know that Brenda still feels very close to Edward, Monica, and Alan but her experiences were different," Sonny said._

 _"_ _Don't be upset with Brenda. I think she was just being honest, not manipulative," Jason said._

 _"_ _I'm not upset with Brenda. You should know by now that is hard for me to do anyway," Sonny said as the elevator opened and Lois Cerullo stepped out._

 _"_ _Did someone forget to tell me we were having a party?" Lois joked._

 _"_ _Actually I was just heading to bed, goodnight," Jason said rather brusquely and disappeared into his own penthouse._

 _"_ _Am I missing something?" Lois wondered._

 _"_ _I think he's just worried about Brenda," Sonny said._

 _"_ _Are Brenda and Jason an item? I mean I know I've lost touch with her a little, but she's dating Jason now? Why didn't she tell me that? Or are you and Jason having issues about that?" Lois asked._

 _"_ _Actually she's dating Detective Cruz Rodriguez and don't even get me started on that topic," Sonny said._

 _"_ _Why not? It sounds interesting, juicy even perhaps. Why don't you come over and you can tell me all about it?" Lois suggested._

 _"_ _You should come over to my place. Kristina is asleep upstairs so I should be around if she needs anything," Sonny said._

 _"_ _Alexis is letting Kristina spend the night?" Lois asked with noted surprise._

 _"_ _Yes," Sonny said simply. He realized that Lois hadn't exactly cared for Alexis when she had been married to Ned. It was hard for him to think about the time when Alexis and Ned had been together. Perhaps he should have realized that the timing was off and there was no way Kristina could be anyone but his child. But he thought Alexis hated him then and he just couldn't face that. So he had just pretended he didn't love her._

 _"_ _So do you have any of your special blend at home?" Lois asked._

 _"_ _Of course," Sonny said with a smile as he guided her into his penthouse._

When he looked back on the end of that conversation he wondered if maybe Lois had pretended she hadn't still loved Ned. He wasn't sure if that was true. He wasn't sure if he wanted to face that truth if it was there. He just shook his head. "I wouldn't know," he said to Brenda, as they finally reached the front of the line.

"Horseys! Horseys!" Molly squealed excitedly.

"Come on, I'll buy you a ride on the Carousel. There isn't a brass ring but I guess you have Cruz already."

Brenda smiled again. "A very good point, thanks!"

He let Molly pick a horse and then secured his arms around her as she wrapped her chubby little hands around the reins. As the carousel began to move, Sonny smiled down at his daughter. He wanted to believe that her mother didn't still hate him. He hoped that wasn't just wishful thinking.


	8. Chapter 8: Just Breathe!

**Chapter 8: Just Breathe**

As she huffed and puffed into a paper bag, Alexis had an eerie suspicion her life might be past the point of return. _Might be?_ she chided herself internally. Her lips felt numb and the room was spinning. Somehow paper bags were more effective when Sonny was holding them. Maybe that was why Ned had been so wary of them as a great strategy. Or maybe it had been because Ned seemed to have infinite trust in his Aunt Monica and who advocated something called diaphragmatic breathing which sounded ridiculous. Ned trying to teach her how to do it had been even more ridiculous.

 _October 2, 1999_

 _"_ _Try to think about filling your lungs from the bottom up," Ned whispered as he readjusted the pillow so it was under shoulders as well as her head._

 _"_ _What?!" Alexis gasped._

 _Ned laid a hand across her chest. "The trick is breathing with your diaphragm not your upper body. I'm going to help you and you can do this. You want to expand your abdomen when you take a breath."_

 _It was a nice thought, Alexis supposed even if it sounded almost as hokey as Feng Shui. Feng Shui made her think of Kristina though which just made it even harder to breathe._

Ned had eventually given up on his attempts to teach her tranquility, or even diaphragmatic breathing. He had discovered that the secret to the paper bag trick was early initiation. He had started carrying paper bags with him everywhere even though he still thought that things would be better if she could just learn diaphragmatic breathing. Perhaps he was right, and it would have been easier to learn how to breathe with her diaphragm if she had practiced when she wasn't stressed. She had laughed at the suggestion because she hadn't wanted to admit she didn't know what it was like to not be stressed. She certainly hadn't at any time during the pregnancy but honestly, she wasn't sure she had at any time in the past year.

That was probably a bigger problem Alexis decided as she slumped back in her chair as her arms got heavier and it was harder to hang onto the stupid paper bag. She needed to get a grip, on the paper bag, on her life, on something. She needed to do something other than watch the room spin and remember the past with Sonny Corinthos and Ned Ashton.

 _Neither of them loved her and she had never loved Ned so why was she even letting herself go there? Maybe she really was neurotic?_ As Alexis contemplated that last question everything faded to black.

XXXXXXXX

Sonny closed his phone with a bad feeling. Normally Alexis would at least take his calls even if she came up with an excuse to hang up only seconds after. Or maybe it wasn't an excuse, she was a busy woman, but if he was honest, he thought it was probably an excuse. He tried to reassure himself that she was in a meeting, or sick of renegotiating the great child exchange as she had put it earlier, whatever that meant. Yet, he still felt uneasy. Anyway, it was almost four so he figured she should be done with her meetings if Baldwin wasn't working her too hard. He probably was, that was probably it, Sonny tried to reassure himself. He wasn't reassured though as he guided both daughters through the mall.

"Can we go to the movies?" Kristina asked.

"We can go pick one out after dinner," Sonny said as he continued walking.

"But I want to see The Game Plan and it is only in theaters," Kristina said.

Sonny hadn't heard of that movie and had a sinking suspicion it was probably one Alexis had already vetoed. He had already messed up with "Bridge to Terrabithia" somehow. Although he still wasn't sure why Alexis had vetoed that one. Brooke had wanted to see it over the summer and it had said ages seven and up on the review for parents he had read. So, he had taken Brooke and Kristina and it had been a disaster. Brooke had cried, or more aptly sobbed and Lois had been out of town so he hadn't had a choice but to call Ned. Kristina had launched into a tantrum because they hadn't stopped to get ice cream on the way home, or maybe because Ned had been focused on Brooke. After all of that, Alexis informed him that Bridge to Terrabitha was on the Kristina may not see movie list but then kept forgetting to give him a copy of the list so he could pick more appropriate movies in the future.

"So, what did your mom say about seeing this the Game Plan?" Sonny asked.

"She didn't say I couldn't," Kristina said.

"Did she say you could?" Sonny asked as they reached the entrance to the mall and he started to pick up Molly.

Kristina slowly stuck out her bottom lip. "I bet Daddy Ned would let me see it," she said.

"Well, Ned isn't your father," Sonny said. Except it was more complicated than that. Kristina had thought Ned was her father for the first almost four years of her life and then she saw Ric more than him for another almost three years.

Kristina didn't say anything more. She silently climbed up into his SUV as he fastened Molly back into her car seat. She was still pouting when he pulled out of the parking lot. _Yeah that was something else he probably needed to address, Ned. He fit in there somewhere maybe after addressing Kristina's tantrums and Brooke's grief over her best friend's death. Or maybe Ned was supposed to be part of him addressing those things but he wasn't quite sure he could go there._

XXXXXXXX

Kyle Durant tossed a few shadow files into his briefcase and closed the top. He had been halfway to the elevator when he realized that if Scott and Abby had already left for the day it was probably his responsibility to make sure Alexis didn't work until midnight as he knew she had done before on Friday nights when Sonny had her daughters.

As he doubled back, Kyle figured he could legitimately pry Alexis away with an offer of dinner. He figured he could even make it believable that she was doing him a favor to dine with him since his girlfriend, Faith, was visiting her cousin who was in the hospital, hopefully not having a baby anytime soon since she was only thirty weeks or something. That might go over better since Alexis hated anything that even resembled a hint of pity. In reality he didn't pity her. He just recognized that life was hard sometimes and he could see how hers was specifically. Even so, lately he had noticed that she was even more on edge than before. He hadn't pried the information out of her earlier, and doing that over dinner wasn't his goal, but he was concerned.

When he initially poked his head into Alexis' office, Kyle smiled that her desk chair was empty. She had left before 4:30 on a Friday afternoon. That was a definite accomplishment. He reached over to toss the remains of the popcorn he had left earlier and noticed the figure lying on the floor. As he dropped his briefcase and knelt beside her, he was slightly reassured to see the rise of her chest. _Breathing was good,_ he thought as he felt a pulse in her neck and reached for his cell phone to call for help.


	9. Chapter 9: Choose Your Battles Carefully

**Chapter 9: Choose Your Battles Carefully**

Dr. Monica Quartermaine took a deep breath as she wheeled the echo machine down the hallway. Sometimes practicing medicine was so much like raising toddlers; you really had to choose your battles carefully. It was different though because AJ wearing that clown nose they had got for his Halloween costume in the Christmas pictures, and even well into the new year, had been harmless. It had even been mildly amusing at first. Sometimes she questioned if Dr. Larmon's desire to rule out dissecting aortic aneurysms in anyone with chest pain who she didn't override him and take to the cath lab immediately was harmless. Quite honestly on the patient in question, especially with the positive d-dimer, she would favor a pulmonary embolus over a dissection.

Except that wasn't actually true, because she knew the patient in question. Because she did, it seemed much more plausible that she had hyperventilated to the point of passing out and hit her head on something on the way down. The fact that she didn't recall that implied to Monica that she needed a CT of her head along with her chest and Monica would have been inclined to have done both of those tests before a trans esophageal echocardiogram if she was in charge. However, as Dr. Larmon was quick to remind her, it wasn't her patient, yet. So, she took another deep breath and pushed the echo machine through the door.

XXXXXXXX

In the waiting area outside the Emergency Department, Kyle Durant tried to not reflect on the last time he had sat in the same position. That had been almost eighteen months ago after Manny Ruiz had crashed his father's dinner party. The gentle vibrations from his cell phone reminded him he hadn't turned it off and he instead picked it up and headed for the side entrance. "Durant," he said as he stepped outside.

"Sonny Corinthos, hate to bother you but I haven't been able to reach Alexis on her cell for the past hour. Kristina left her inhaler in Alexis' car. I tried to just pick up a new one but the pharmacy says there aren't any refills left on the prescription."

Kyle supposed no one could argue that Sonny wasn't a responsible father. "Does she need it right now?" he asked.

"No, it's the one she is supposed to do twice a day but I guess things were hectic this morning so she did it in the car and forgot to put it in her bag. She won't need it until tonight but I was hoping to catch her before she headed out on her date."

 _Alexis had a date?_ Kyle wondered if Sonny actually believed that or if he was just fishing for information. He suspected the latter. Carly would have said he was a control freak and, where Carly was concerned, Kyle might believe that. He also could acknowledge that both parties had contributed to the dysfunction of their third marriage, and probably to the preceding two although he hadn't been around for those really. Their divorce had been final for about a week and he really hoped it would be their final divorce. Of course, the custody issue of their two sons still remained to be determined and Kyle wasn't looking forward to that either. "What if I drop Kristina's inhaler off before bed? Sometime before eight, right?"

"Is Alexis alright?"

In spite of his profession's negative stereotypes, Kyle didn't lie. Yet, he believed in people's right to privacy. "I will have her call you when things settle down. In the meantime, I will make sure that Kristina gets her inhaler," he suggested.

"I'd hate to inconvenience you. If you and Lex are going to be working all night I'll just swing by the courthouse. That way I can make sure my movie selections are appropriate."

"That probably isn't a good idea."

"Why is that?"

 _Ok, so maybe privacy wasn't always possible_ , Kyle decided as he took a deep breath.

XXXXXXXX

 _I am so onto you, Edward!_ Lois Cerullo thought as she hung up the phone. It was strangely inconvenient that Claudia Phillips had become too overextended with the town council to continue to serve on the Charles Street Foundation Board just when she had returned to Port Charles. Oh Edward had claimed that Claudia had wanted to resign sooner but he had begged her to stay until they could find a suitable replacement. As far as Lois was concerned, he still hadn't if he thought it was her. Spending more time with Ned's family was about the last thing she wanted to do. Plus, Ned was on the same darn board.

So, she had politely declined. Or she had tried to. In typical Quartermaine fashion Edward hadn't taken no for an answer. In a weak moment she had finally agreed to serve on his stupid board just to get him to shut up. There had been a time when Ned would have gotten her out of it, apparently that had passed. Or maybe he was too distracted trying to figure out how to be a single parent. It wasn't as easy as his mother claimed. Or it wasn't if you didn't send your child off to boarding school at the first sign of disobedience. She could have never done that to Brooke. Of course, sometimes she wondered if boarding school might have been the more compassionate answer than life with the Quartermaines. Perhaps Tracy had done her son a favor. Perhaps she hadn't done Brooke any after all.

The knock at the door pulled her partially from her thoughts. With a pensive frown she took a few steps and opened the door. _Apparently, someone else isn't taking no for an answer,_ she thought as she saw Sonny standing in the doorway with Molly in his arms and Kristina standing in front of him clutching a bowl of salad.

"I need a favor," Sonny said.

"Why am I not surprised?"

Kristina looked from Lois to her father. "Maybe Aunt Lois doesn't want us to have dinner here," she said.

"Aunt Lois is just surprised. Why don't you take the salad into the kitchen and I'll grab the lasagna and Panini from the oven," Sonny said.

Kristina didn't move. She looked back up at her father who gestured sternly with his eyes. Then she pouted slightly but did comply.

"Where do you want this?" Bruno asked from the doorway where he stood holding a playpen.

Sonny shook his head. "I told you to collapse that thing first. You aren't going to get it through the door," he said.

"Sorry, boss, but, well, Ernesto told me the last time he collapsed the thing he could never get it back up. You might want to step out of the way Ma'am I need to get a little bit of a running start."

Sonny held up an extended palm. "Just set it down, Bruno. Here, Lois," he said as he passed Molly to her.

For just a minute, as Molly wrapped her chubby little arms around her neck, Lois remembered Brooke at that age. Brooke had been scrawnier and she had been a total daddy's girl. From the way Molly turned her little face to watch Sonny collapse the playpen it was pretty clear she was too.

Sonny leaned the playpen just inside the door. "Let me just grab that lasagna."

"So, we're going to have dinner with you while daddy gets my inhaler," Kristina announced when she came back into the room.

"Right, of course," Lois said. Although she had a feeling that while Sonny would probably return with Kristina's missing inhaler there was much more to the story.

XXXXXXXX

Back at PCGH, Dr. Monica Quartermaine hung up the Dictaphone, after dictating the stat reading on Alexis Davis' stat trans esophageal echocardiogram, with a sigh. As expected, the echocardiogram was completely normal. As she started around the corner, she saw Dr. Joe Scanlon approaching with a stack of papers.

"You're on call for Cardiology tonight, right?" he asked.

"Yes, what do you need?"

"Just take a look at this EKG. Chest pain started about thirty minutes before presentation."

Monica took the tracing and looked at it quickly. "Oh, he needs to go to the cath lab. Did you give them a heads up? Can you also give a heparin bolus?" she asked.

"The unit clerk is supposed to be calling. He's over here in trauma five," Dr. Scanlon said as they turned in the opposite direction.

"Is Dr. Larmon still here?"

"No, he had to leave early for some reason. Honestly, I just don't even ask anymore. He told me he's waiting on an echo on the lady in seven."

"I just finished dictating it. It is completely normal. I think she probably had panic attack and passed out but she has PE risk factors so I would recommend a PE Protocol CT. I think she hit her head when she fell so you need a Head CT too, definitely if you're going to anticoagulate."

"Just out of curiosity, did you mention any of this to Dr. Larmon?"

"Yes, but he pointed out that technically it wasn't my patient. I guess it still isn't but those are my recommendations. If you do all of that and it is negative and you feel uncomfortable discharging and want to do a twenty-four hour rule out call me later and I'll take care of the admission," Monica said as they reached trauma five.

"Thanks, I'll see if they can do that Head CT immediately so we can anticoagulate if we get held up with the Chest CT," Joe said as they stepped into the room. He turned to the patient. "Mr. Pratt, this is Dr. Quartermaine she is going to take care of getting your arteries reopened so you're getting blood to your heart and brain."

Mr. Pratt seemed to look her once over as she stepped closer to the bed. "Don't you have someone male?" he asked.

"Actually, Dr. Quartermaine is our Cardiology and Critical Care Chief. You're in good hands, Sir, try to remember it's 2007 and women can do anything they want to do."

Monica pulled out her stethoscope as Dr. Scanlon left the room and reminded herself of benefit of choosing battles carefully.


	10. Chapter 10: Is It Too Late?

**Chapter 10: Is It Too Late?**

Sonny Corinthos wasn't sure what to think as he drove across town. Terror gripped him as he gripped the steering wheel in his SUV. He wanted to believe she would be alright. He had to believe she would be alright. Their daughters needed her, he needed her. There was still so much more he needed to say.

The truth was that he loved her. He always would, even if she couldn't reciprocate his feelings. For a split-second Sonny wondered if couldn't was actually wouldn't and if wouldn't could be negotiable. Maybe that wasn't a fantasy. He could dream he supposed.

XXXXXXXX

Kristina put another bite of lasagna in her mouth and decided maybe it was only her favorite food if her father made it and was eating it with her. It didn't taste quite as good if he wasn't sitting across the table.

"Ok, enough patting the lasagna with the spoon. It's really cute, Brookie used to do that too but it isn't getting any food into your tummy," her Aunt Lois told her little sister. Then she reached out, took the spoon from Molly's grasp, scooped up a bite of lasagna and passed it back to her.

"Why do you call her Brookie? No one else does." Kristina said.

"It's just a nickname, it's sort of like your mom calls you Krissy," Lois said.

"Did Daddy Ned call her Brookie before?" Kristina asked.

"No, I don't think so."

"Why not?" Kristina asked.

"It just wasn't a name he ever used," Aunt Lois said.

Kristina had never realized that names could be so complicated until her mother had told her she couldn't call Ned daddy anymore because he wasn't her father, not really. She had started to call him Daddy Ned then because it sounded almost as good. Kristina had been able to tell that her mother hadn't really liked that but she hadn't been able to explain why she could call Ric, Daddy Ric since he was married to her but not call Ned, Daddy Ned after all he had been married to her longer than Daddy Ric had been. Plus, Daddy Ned had never been scary and Daddy Ric had been scary at times.

 _March 24, 2005_

 _Kristina pulled the door to the cabinet closed as she heard her mommy and Daddy Ric's voices come into the kitchen. She was practicing hiding in case the bad blonde lady came back. Her mommy had promised that the bad lady would never come back again but Kristina didn't quite believe that. So, she practiced hiding from her mommy and Daddy Ric so she would be ready in case the bad lady came back._

 _"_ _We aren't going and that is final, Ric," her mother said._

 _"_ _Michael was Kristina's brother. You didn't let her go to the funeral. She deserves a chance to say goodbye," Daddy Ric said._

 _"_ _This isn't about Kristina and you know that, Richard. If you want to go to the park dedication and add to the happy Corinthos family photo opportunity then go right ahead. My daughter will not be joining you!" her mother said._

 _Kristina heard the clicks of her mother's heels as she stormed out of the room. She heard a thud and clatter as it sounded like Daddy Ric threw a glass at the wall. She wondered if that was what had happened but she was a little too frightened to poke her head out and find out. Sometimes she wondered why Daddy Ric had been friends with the bad lady and why it had been so important that she never tell her mommy. Daddy Ned had never made her keep secrets from her mommy. Most of the time she wished that her mommy had stayed married to Daddy Ned instead of marrying Daddy Ric._

 _"_ _Ric!" Kristina heard her mother's voice. She sounded scared and as Kristina huddled in the cabinet she wondered if her mother was afraid of Daddy Ric sometimes too. She had never been afraid of Daddy Ned._

 _Kristina heard her mother's heels come back into the kitchen. "It's Kristina, she isn't in her bedroom! They've taken her! The Sandovals, they've taken her!"_

 _Kristina was torn between calming her mother and not revealing her hiding spot. After all, when she played hide and seek with her cousins at Uncle Alan and Aunt Monica's house the rules were you never revealed your hiding place if you weren't found. Her cousin Riley was the best at the game. He could practically vanish into thin air._

 _"_ _Baby, breathe. I'm sure Kristina is around her somewhere, she probably just didn't hear you calling her. Let's go back and look upstairs," Daddy Ric said._

 _Kristina counted to twenty after she could no longer hear their voices and then she slowly opened the cabinet and slipped out. She would be stealth, whatever that meant. She had heard her cousin Riley say he was and it sounded good. She tiptoed around the broken glass, out of the kitchen, and into the large open living room. She curled up on the couch and pulled the magic afghan down from the back of it. Her grandma had knit the afghan for her and Kristina liked to pretend that when she wrapped up in it that Daddy Ned was still with her. As she remembered one of the songs daddy Ned used to sing she drifted off to sleep._

Kristina supposed she should feel badly for scaring her mother like that. She hadn't really meant to scare her. She had just been practicing hiding and then she needed Daddy Ned. She had only meant to curl up under the magic afghan for a little while she hadn't meant to fall asleep. She did feel badly that she scared her mother then, or she did most of the time when she remembered that night.

Other times she was still mad at her mother for making Daddy Ned go away. She had overheard Emily and her Grandma talking about it and saying that Ned did love her. That had made her so happy but her mom was always making excuses for why she couldn't spend time with Daddy Ned. Sort of like she and Daddy Ric had done with her real daddy. Kristina didn't want to be mad at her mother but sometimes it was hard not to be. She had wanted to blame Daddy Ric for making Daddy Ned go away. It really was kind of his fault. Her mother had explained that you could only be married to one person at a time so she couldn't be married to Ned anymore if she was married to Ric. But even after Ric went away because he was bad, her mother still didn't let her see Daddy Ned. He still loved her though. Kristina was sure of that but it was still nice to hear it sometimes.

 _December 4, 2006_

 _Kristina shrugged off her coat as they sat down in the waiting room but pushed her hands back into her mittens on a string. Her Grandma had made them that way so she wouldn't lose them. She had made a matching pair for Molly too. She had also let her pick out the yarn. They had gone to a really cool store in Port Charles Crossings that had more yarn than Kristina had ever seen. They had every color imaginable, even some Kristina had never imagined before._

 _"_ _Kristina, sweetie, please, you have to talk to Dr. Baldwin otherwise she can't help you," her mother said as they waited._

 _Her mother sounded stressed and sad. She had sounded that way a lot since the summer. Well really since the night that her mother had met them at the launch with Sam's friend Jason. They had gone to her Grandpa Mike's restaurant and had dinner with her daddy, Michael, Morgan, and her daddy's friend Brenda, but not Sam. That night they had gone back to Wyndamere, where they had stayed for a few days until her mom's friend from work, Mr. Baldwin, helped them move into the town home they lived in. Her mother had explained that she and Daddy Ric were getting a divorce. She had looked sad so Kristina had tried to cheer her up and said that she really liked Daddy Ned better._

 _Her mother had explained she wasn't marrying Daddy Ned again. Kristina had just wanted to help so she had suggested that her mom could marry her father. Her mother had laughed at that suggestion and reminded her father was married to Carly._

 _That hadn't made sense to Kristina since Michael had said that Carly was on a cruise with Jax when they had gone to dinner. Her mother had already explained that they couldn't go on a trip with Daddy Ned since she was married to Ric. So why could Carly go on a trip with Jax if she was married to her dad? She hadn't asked her mother because she had looked more stressed then and Molly had started to cry._

 _Kristina had wanted to make her mother happier then. She still did but she didn't want to talk to Dr. Baldwin. She supposed she was nice, she was her cousin Nicole's Grandma. Last time she had let her draw pictures and hadn't made her talk but her mother expected words. Didn't she understand that Kristina didn't have words?_

 _She saw Dr. Baldwin come out of her office towards them. Dr. Baldwin smiled. Kristina tried to force a smile but she couldn't and before she knew it she was running out the door. She ran down the corridor the way she wished she had been able to the night she had walked into the warehouse looking for the stray puppy. She kept running until she hit something, well, someone. Crying she looked up into familiar eyes….Daddy Ned._

 _"_ _Kristina, sweetheart, what is wrong?" Daddy Ned asked._

 _She didn't answer him. She couldn't._

 _He hesitated for another moment and then he picked her up. She buried her head in his chest feeling almost safe._

 _"_ _Kristina, can you tell me what happened? It's ok, sweetheart, maybe I can help," Daddy Ned whispered as he carried her down the corridor._

 _Kristina really tried to explain but words didn't come out. She felt Daddy Ned wrap an arm around her more securely._

 _"_ _I hope someday you will understand that all of the choices I have made in your life have been because I love you," Daddy Ned whispered._

 _Kristina caught a shaky breath. Cousin Emily had been right._

 _"_ _Kristina!" she heard her mother's more frantic panicked voice. She just buried her face deeper in Daddy Ned's chest and clung to him._

 _Ned kept walking. "Alexis, what happened?" he asked._

 _"_ _I think she just got scared. She ran out of Dr. Baldwin's office, maybe I put too much pressure on her."_

 _"_ _What do you mean?"_

 _"_ _Kristina, sweetie, it's ok you don't have to say anything to Dr. Baldwin if you don't want to. We don't even have to go back today. We can go home," her mother promised._

 _Going home was tempting but Kristina found herself burying her face deeper in Daddy Ned's chest. It was one of those things that just sort of happened sort of like an accident except it wasn't really. She hadn't planned it though. She had given up on planning to see Daddy Ned because that never worked. But if she was lucky enough to bump into him and she went to him he wouldn't turn her away. So, she sometimes saw him a few times a year. It wasn't the same but she tried to pretend it was. When her mom wasn't home, she wrapped herself up in her magic afghan and listened to one of his CDs and pretended that he was there singing to her. She pretended a lot._

"I need my magic afghan!" Kristina said.

"After you finish your dinner we can go across the hall to your dad's place,"Aunt Lois said.

"No, I forgot and left it at home but I need it! I need it!"

XXXXXXXX

Lois understood that all kids had transitional objects. She remembered Brooke's attachment to Paddington. She didn't think she has still been as attached to him by the time she was Kristina's age but she still slept with him if possible. Or Lois thought she did, it had been months since she had tucked her daughter into bed.

"I really need it!" Kristina repeated.

"I'll call your dad and see if he can bring it home when he picks up your inhaler," Lois said. She presumed if Sonny was picking up Kristina's inhaler he was probably going to Alexis's home. The whole situation still struck her as odd but she trusted him so she would ask questions later.

"But I need it now!" Kristina whined.

Lois had been about to suggest to Kristina that she would survive finishing her dinner without her precious afghan but the whines turned into sobs. Kristina seemed to have both the best parts, and, well, also the most problematic parts, of both of her parents so Lois had seen quite a few of her little tantrums but that wasn't what she was seeing. She knew that.

Lois got up from the table and went around to stand beside Kristina's chair. "Do you need your magic afghan or do you need your grandmother?" Lois asked as a cold chill ran down her spine. She couldn't believe that she was contemplating a trip to her former mother in law's home. She had avoided doing that while she and Ned were married. She had absolutely refused to do that after they divorced. Yet, that was probably just another one of her major mistakes where her daughter was concerned.

Kristina caught her breath and sniffled. "Both," she said.

"Well, do you think you can finish your dinner while I call your father and then, if he won't be right home with your inhaler and magic afghan, I guess we can go visit your grandmother."

Kristina took a shaky breath and looked up at her with wide eyes. "Really?"

"Yes," Lois said as she silently prayed that Sonny was on his way home.

XXXXXXXX

Sonny Corinthos flicked open his phone as he stepped through the sliding doors of the Emergency Department and PCGH. "Yeah."

"Where are you?" Lois asked as a woman frowned at him and pointed at the sign that indicated cell phones weren't allowed.

"It's a long story," Sonny said as the woman glared more intently. He tossed up his hands in defeat, turned, and went back out the sliding doors.

"Well, give me the short version, Corinthos, because your daughter is having a must have my magic afghan crisis and apparently, she forgot that as well."

"Her what? Her magic afghan?" Sonny asked. _Was that like some kind of magic carpet._

"Tracy knits. She started when I was pregnant with Brooke, I guess. I'm sure Kristina has a few afghans by now. I think Brooke got one every year. You don't know how hard it was to explain why these things just kept showing up. I used to bury them at the bottom of that cedar chest."

Sonny vaguely remembered a blanket Kristina had that looked like it was handmade, maybe that was the magic afghan. "So, you kept them all?" he asked.

"Yeah, this is messed up but I kept everything. Well I guess really the messed-up part was that I didn't just give it all to her at the time. Somehow, I just couldn't because I couldn't deal with the questions and as she got older; she got more curious and it just got harder. Sometimes I'd just give things to her without saying anything. Other things I packed away thinking I'd have more strength next month or next year," Lois admitted.

"But it just got harder?"

"Basically, so can you bring her afghan home when you come?"

"Is this thing orange?"

"If it's the thing she was all wrapped up in when she was upset last winter, I think I'd call it apricot," Lois said.

Sonny shook his head. _Aren't they the same thing?_

"So, are you going to be home soon?" Lois asked.

"I don't know," Sonny said as his need to get to Alexis was reignited. Carly's brother had assured him that she would be ok but honestly, he wasn't sure he really trusted the guy. He had never trusted his father, but if he was honest Sonny thought he regretted that. He heard Lois sigh.

"Well, in that case I guess I'm doomed. Kristina decided that she really needs her grandmother as much as she needs her afghan so I sort of told her I'd take her if you weren't coming right home."

"You what?" Sonny asked. He still didn't like the idea of Kristina calling Judge Quartermaine-Grabler, Grandma. He had tried to explain to Alexis that it was probably just confusing for her and Alexis had said something about how it wasn't like either of them wanted her calling Helena grandmother. He'd give Alexis that but he still thought there were other options, like, well, Gloria Cerullo.

"She was just sobbing, Sonny. It calmed her down but I was hoping you'd be home and then maybe you and her magic afghan would pacify her."

"So you're really going to take her to the Grablers'?"

"I don't lie, and I keep promises, do I have a choice? I guess I should be careful what I promise. I was with Brooke. But maybe I never promised enough."

Sonny heard the pain in her voice. He wasn't sure what to say and his concerns for Alexis came back to the forefront of his consciousness but he couldn't just ignore it either. "You're a good mother, I'm never going to believe anything different. Brooke is just confused now but she still needs you," he said as an ambulance whirred by towards the emergency entrance.

"Are you at the hospital?" Lois asked.

"Umm," Sonny hesitated.

"What happened to Brenda?"

"Nothing, as far as I know, she's probably having some candlelight dinner with Cruz as we speak."

"Hmm, so if Brenda is fine, then what is it?" Lois asked.

"Alexis passed out at work, I don't know anything. Supposedly it's no big deal but I think Kyle just said that so I wouldn't come down here."

"Apparently he didn't realize being vague is exactly the way to get you to barge right into the situation," Lois said.

"I only barge into situations of people I care about."

"So, I've heard, so I guess we'll have to talk about that later."

"Say hi, to Judge Grabler for me," Sonny said.

Lois groaned. "The things I do for your daughter."

Sonny had to admit he wasn't sure he would have taken Brooke to the Grablers. Maybe he would have, maybe. "I love you, and you're a good mother," he said.

"Yeah, well, umm call me when you find something out ok?"

"Sure, thanks," Sonny said then he closed his phone and started back into the emergency department.

* _Don't worry the next chapter is almost completely Sexis. This started as just a lead in to that but I decided that Kristina's thoughts (and Lois & Sonny's conversation) needed to stay. Kristina is an often very confused little girl as a result of the choices that the adults in her life have made. That isn't really the story but the more I write this I realize it has to be a part of the story, because (as Lois alluded in this chapter) I see Kristina as inheriting the best pieces of both of her parents and unfortunately also probably inheriting the potential to have their same struggles. Hopefully she will become more grounded and secure in their love and the latter won't come to pass.*_


	11. Chapter 11: Parents Are People

**Chapter 11: Parents Are People With Children**

Alexis Davis gritted her teeth and mumbled obscenities in Russian as the nurse jabbed the injection into her stomach. "Are you sure you're doing this right?" she said aloud in English.

The African American nurse, who's name Alexis thought was Rita or maybe Reena tossed the needle and syringe into the sharps container. "The Lovenox is supposed to given subcutaneously, Ms. Davis."

"Ok, great, so now can I go?"

"No, they still have to do the Chest CT and Dr. Scanlon said he wanted at least another EKG and a second set of markers before you go."

"Well, when is that going to be? You know I have things to do?"

"I think they are a little backed up in radiology. There was a multiple car accident on the highway so Dr. Scanlon told them to just do your head CT and then get the Chest CT later."

"Well, if it's going to be awhile maybe I could just come back tomorrow," Alexis suggested.

"No, you can lie back and get comfortable because you aren't going anywhere until after they have done all the tests they need," Scott Baldwin said from the doorway.

Alexis frowned at the sight of her boss. She realized that Scott was probably concerned but she didn't really want to think about that, because that required facing her own mortality. She also didn't feel like rehashing everything with the situation with Ric. Then there was the fact that Kyle had admitted that Sonny would probably be showing up soon before he had gone to retrieve Kristina's forgotten inhaler from her car which was still locked in the garage under the courthouse. Alexis didn't feel like she had the energy to deal with either Scott or Sonny but she certainly didn't have the energy to deal with them together. That just made the situation exponentially worse. "Is that an order?" she finally asked.

"Does it need to be? You have two adorable little girls and I don't want to have to explain to either of them that something happened to their mom."

"So says the man who signed out AMA with a head injury," Alexis said.

"I had a concussion, and I swear if I hadn't been an attorney and the Chief of Staff's brother in law Dr. Jones would have discharged me from the ER. Anyway, we were in the middle of several family crises. One of my daughters was missing, another daughter was still recovering from the trauma of being held hostage during orientation, and my sister was probably still traumatized from that cokehead cardiologist someone thought it was a good idea to hire."

"Wasn't Dr. Dorman hired by her husband?"

"No, that was Dr. Steve Hardy who also hired the illustrious Dr. Bennett Devlin but my mother always said it was impolite to speak ill of the dead so I will say nothing further about any of the three. The point is I wasn't going to just hang out in the hospital when my daughter was missing. The whole thing got blown out of proportion anyway, and if the neurosurgeon on call really felt so strongly that I couldn't leave then he could have taken the time to come down and talk to me in the ER rather than turfing that responsibility to some poor intern."

"You mean Dr. Tony Jones? He was probably too busy playing mattress tag with his stepdaughter."

"As I said before, it's impolite to speak ill of the dead. But the divorce was final before I got mowed down, by that, still yet to be apprehended motorist, so she wouldn't have been his stepdaughter then."

"Let me guess, you handled their divorce too? Do you handle all your ex-wives divorces?" Alexis asked. She knew he had handled Laura and Luke Spencer's divorce in 1998.

"Bobbie and I were never married, but I did help her with the divorce. She needed a friend, I just happened to be an attorney as well."

"How convenient."

"Not exactly for Tony; but these things happen. Did you want me to call Ned or something?" Scott asked.

"Why would you call Ned?" Alexis asked. Yet, she knew the answer. Scott who had just for some reason kept presuming that she and Jax were involved had finally realized Jax was at least theoretically with Carly. With Jax out of contention, he had apparently dropped back to Ned.

Sometimes Alexis wondered if Scott just didn't believe that women were capable being alone. She had never known Serena's mother, who was probably at least the most stable love of Scott's life, but it seemed like all of his other relationships followed a pattern of rescue. He stood by Dr. Evelyn Lambert through the tumultuous trials and tribulations of her intern year. Alexis had been PCGH Pro Counsel then and she spent a decent amount of time just dealing with the headlines resulting from the unfortunate intersection of the young woman's past and present. The details were different but she thought that the situations were very similar for the subsequent relationships he had been in with Laura Webber, Lucy Coe, and Bobbie Spencer. The difference was he had a prior past with all of those women although she could believe that if Eve had lived, and somehow the Thornharts hadn't been able to make their marriage work Serena very well might have a little stepbrother named Danny. For some people familiarity bred contempt, but not for Scott Baldwin.

"I just thought maybe you needed someone. I think Ned would want to be here for you," Scott said.

Well, quite honestly, Alexis had pretty much given up on needing anyone because it just left her disappointed. As for Ned, the, perhaps pathetic, thing was she could probably call him and he would come. Alexis doubted it would really be for her though. It might be some sense of obligation to Kristina's sister, or possibly to Kristina's mother, or just because Ned Ashton had a really hard time walking away from someone in trouble. Alexis had no intention of calling him though.

"Obviously you're behind on the PCPD scuttlebutt. I'm sure Ned has big plans with Allison."

Scott appeared shocked. "Allison? She's practically young enough to be his daughter."

That was a bit of an interesting reply from a man who had dated one of his daughter's best friends. Alexis thought Scott had only been eighteen or perhaps nineteen when Karen was born but still. "I highly doubt she's even five years younger than Ned."

"Five years? Try more like fifteen, I think she was in Emily's class in school. Maybe she was a year or two ahead but I'd say two years max."

"She's got a ten-year-old daughter Scott and she was hardly a teen mom."

"Allison Barrington has a ten-year-old daughter?"

"No, but Allison Jordan, who Ned is dating, does."

"Oh," Scott said.

Alexis just shut her eyes and shook her head. Unfortunately, when she opened her eyes moments later there stood Sonny in the doorway. Alexis sighed. _Score one more for Mr. Impeccable timing._

"You know, Corinthos, this really isn't a good time. Just call my office on Monday morning and I'm sure we can work out some deal where you do maximum prison time," Scott said.

Sonny looked amused for half of a second before his eyes grew hard and dark. Alexis knew that look and those eyes all too well. Their daughter had them.

"As appealing as that sounds, Baldwin, I didn't come to talk to you. If you don't mind, I'd like a little privacy with the mother of my children," Sonny said.

Scott raised his eyes at Sonny's use of the plural but didn't comment. Alexis wondered if perhaps even Scott could see that if the choices for Molly's father were Ric or Sonny then Sonny would easily be the choice. Of course, Scott also felt that if the choices for Kristina's father had been Sonny or Ned Alexis should have never broken her silence. They had discussed that before when he had called her on her distraction.

 _April 25, 2007_

 _"_ _Well if you must know, and apparently you must, I wasn't even thinking about Jax. I was thinking about Kristina. She has this art show at school today and she'll be devastated if everyone isn't there. Well, in Sonny's case, sometimes being there is beyond his control," Alexis said._

 _"_ _You make it sound as if his possible absence was for a noble purpose, like a doctor who had to save a life, or even a cop. If Sonny misses her art show, for another shootout in the warehouse district, forgive me if I don't feel too sorry for him," Scott said._

 _"_ _My point was only that things come up. If Sonny isn't there Kristina will be hurt," Alexis said._

 _"_ _Well perhaps the sooner that Kristina accepts the reality of her criminal father's life the better," Scott suggested._

 _"_ _Don't refer to him that way," Alexis fumed._

 _"_ _Why not? It's true," Scott protested._

 _"_ _Actually, it isn't. He's never been convicted of anything. Last time I checked, Scott, you weren't exactly a perfect person either," Alexis challenged. She realized that her words were unfair although Scott had made some stupid, and perhaps even illegal, choices in the past, in a time long before she even knew he existed. When his daughter had been born fifteen years ago, he had left the past in the past._

 _Taking over as DA in the shroud that their office faced because of the multiple illegal, and frankly brutally malicious, offenses her former husband Ric Lansing had committed during his tenure had not been easy she was sure. Scott had not wavered from the straight and narrow, still he didn't have to be so self-righteous about her daughter's father. Sonny wasn't a bad man, and she could see how much he loved their daughter._

 _"_ _He's never been convicted because he had a good attorney. Chapparal County is glad you finally came back from the dark side," Scott quipped._

 _"_ _You can detest Michael Corinthos Jr all you want, but I won't allow you to refer to him as Kristina's criminal father. That isn't fair to Kristina," Alexis said firmly._

 _"_ _If you want my opinion the most unfair thing to Kristina is that she not only has that monster's blood running through her veins, but that she also knows that he is her father. You should have stayed with Ned when you had the chance," Scott said._

 _"_ _First, I don't want your opinion. Secondly, I regret lying to Kristina, and the world, about who her father was. I made choices that were unfair to a lot of people," Alexis admitted._

 _"_ _You were trying to protect her, that part I could understand," Scott said._

 _"_ _But I didn't protect her. Ned's rejection hurt her deeply, and I'm the one who set that all in motion," Alexis admitted sadly._

 _"_ _Do you feel badly about hurting Kristina or about hurting Corinthos?" Scott asked._

 _"_ _Both," Alexis said flatly._

 _"_ _This is the wrong time for you to be seeing Corinthos as the injured, misunderstood party again. You know, now that we formed the alliance with the FBI, we're going to clean up this town. Corinthos is going to be one of the casualties so if you can't separate your personal and professional lives this is the time to get out. I don't want to see you go, Alexis, but I can't have doubts about if you're playing for the other team," Scott said._

 _"_ _When have I ever compromised an investigation or evidence for Sonny Corinthos?" Alexis asked angrily._

 _"_ _To my knowledge, never. I just want us to be clear," Scott said._

 _"_ _Oh, we're clear, Scott," Alexis said. She didn't even bother to hide the anger in her voice._

 _"_ _Good. Well I've got that evidence hearing on the Todesto case in thirty minutes. Why don't you go ahead and take off a little early so you can get to Kristina's art show," Scott suggested._

 _"_ _I thought Kyle was handling that hearing," Alexis said._

 _"_ _He was until he came down with the flu," Scott explained._

 _"_ _You don't sound convinced," Alexis said. Fellow ADA Kyle Durant was the son of the late US attorney John Durant._

 _"_ _Well, considering he originally requested vacation this week, which was denied, I was a little suspicious. But I went to see him yesterday afternoon and he looked awful. I seriously almost insisted he let me take him to the hospital," Scott admitted as he transferred some papers from his desk into his briefcase and then closed the briefcase._

 _"_ _Well, maybe someone should check on him today," Alexis suggested._

 _"_ _Yes, I called him, he's got a doctor's appointment today," Scott said._

 _"_ _Well that's good," Alexis said._

 _"_ _Yes, anyway you should go, and I better head to my hearing. Dara Jensen is opposing counsel, I really wish we could lure her back from the dark side too," Scott quipped as he picked his briefcase up off the desk._

Yet, when Alexis remembered that conversation with Scott, besides Kristina's pain, and her responsibility for that, what she thought about was the period she had been Sonny's attorney. In spite of how she had portrayed it after the fact that hadn't been a bad time. As pathetic as it might be to admit, Sonny had been her first friend, and perhaps the friend he had been to her then was the best friend anyone had ever been. "Scott, why don't you go see if Kyle is back with Kristina's inhaler?" she suggested.

Scott looked at her warily but he did step from the room.

Sonny shoved his hands in his pocket as he crossed the room. "Thanks for calling off Baldwin. How are you feeling?" he asked.

"I figured the less time you spent together the less likely I'd be spending the rest of the evening in the PCPD paying someone's bail. Are the girls alright?" Alexis asked. She knew she had ignored his question but she couldn't answer it. She didn't want to lie to him, yet, getting into the truth with him was more than she could handle.

XXXXXXXX

As he sat down in the chair Scott had been in moments earlier, Sonny was well aware that Alexis had ignored his question and tossed out her own. He wasn't sure if that was just her maternal devotion showing through or if she wanted to distract him. Probably both. "They're fine. Lois was taking them over to visit the Grablers.

"I didn't realize that Lois was getting along so well with Ned's family. That is a change."

Sonny let that comment go. "So, what happened before?" he asked.

"We've been through this before, Sonny. Try to take notes this time. You hired Scott's daughter as an exotic dancer in your night club. Somehow you were the person who she turned to when her drug addiction spiraled out of control. On some level, he's probably actually grateful that you helped her. But on another level, he feels like he should have been there. He didn't know so he couldn't have been but the situation is what it is. So just cut him a little slack."

Sonny was quite sure she had not misunderstood what he had been asking but had answered a different question just to reaffirm that her life was not a topic of discussion. _Yet, she would discuss her life with Baldwin? Yeah, that made sense._

 _Or maybe it did,_ Sonny decided with a pang. _Alexis had slept with him when she had worked for him. She had never worked for, or apparently slept with, Ned. She had slept with Ric while she had worked for him. Scott had taken Ric's job and become Alexis' boss. Was he also filling that place in her bed? Kristina certainly did seem to mention mommy's friend Scott a lot._ "If you marry Baldwin my daughters will not be calling him daddy Scotty," he said.

"I'll take that under advisement," Alexis said without betraying any emotions on her face.

Somehow her calmness almost made him feel worse. _So, did that mean she was sleeping with Baldwin? Was she considering marrying him?_ Sonny supposed that couldn't be a worse mistake than marrying Ric had been for her. He wasn't sure if it was any better. Of course, Karen had seemed to feel Scott had been a good father, once she told him he was hers of course. Baldwin probably wouldn't sleep around the way Ric had, or at least he wouldn't be so obvious about it. So maybe he was better than Ric but Sonny was still not sure that was saying much.

Sonny exhaled as he gripped his chin. He glanced at Alexis again. She was fiddling with the sheet as if she was uncomfortable. _Had she gotten horrible news before he arrived? Was it just his presence that upset her? Did she really just want him to leave so she could cry with Baldwin?_

Sonny took another deep breath and remembered that there had been a time she had been able to cry with him. _How did he get that time back?_


	12. Chapter 12: He Isn't Into Incest

_*Family Court Judge, Tracy Quartermaine married sane psychiatrist Dr. Ryan Grabler in 1985. They had two children Dylan Albert (in September 1986) and Shannon Lila (in May 1991). Unlike their older brother they have hyphenated names.*_

 _*In this version of canon Alexis never had cancer in 2006 although she and Sonny still connected some in friendship as he was dealing with his bipolar and Alexis was recovering from the Sic affair.*_

 _*Alexis met Trevor once during her marriage to Ric. He subsequently came to Port Charles in early 2007 to blast Alexis for not bringing Kristina and Molly to Ric's funeral. Alexis slammed the door in his face and wouldn't let him see Molly.*_

 **Chapter 12: She doesn't want to sleep with her boss. He isn't into incest.**

Alexis was proud of her external feigned calm demeanor. Especially since inside she was a mess of nerves and feelings. _Did Sonny really think she had feelings for Scott? That was so ridiculous…he was her boss for heaven's sake._

Of course, as Alexis struggled to take another deep breath, she figured that probably supported Sonny's theory. After all, Kristina had been conceived while Sonny had been her boss. Molly had been conceived while Ric had been. But Sonny had been her friend and well, Ric, that was just a mistake Alexis couldn't begin to explain or defend. Thinking about it just made her head hurt more and made it even harder to breathe. She was still trying to forget about Ric when the orderly came to take her away for the Chest CT.

XXXXXXXX

"I swear it's a word, Granny," Brooke Lynn Ashton said after laying tiles down on the scrabble board.

"Can you use it in a sentence?" Tracy Quartermaine-Grabler asked her granddaughter.

Brooke Lynn shrugged her shoulders. "Well, no, but, really, I swear it is a word."

"It is a word, and after we're done playing you're going to look it up in the dictionary. That is what I used to make your father do."

"You played scrabble with my dad?"

"Yes, it is one of the things I don't regret about his childhood."

"You have regrets about dad's childhood."

"Yes, I think all parents have some regrets when they look back. But I suppose I have more regrets about your father's childhood than Dylan or Shannon's. It can be very hard to be a single parent. It can also be very hard to grow up without your father which is why I think your mother did a very brave thing last spring when she brought you back. I'm sure that wasn't easy for her."

Brooke Lynn shrugged her shoulders again. She seemed to consider that but didn't say anything as the doorbell peeled in the background. "You should just put a sign on the door; Shannon is at the football game, her flowers can be delivered there," she suggested.

"You know I'm sure Dylan would have taken you with him if you had wanted to go," Tracy said as she got up from the couch.

"I didn't really want to go. Football is kind of silly, at least soccer takes a little skill. Dad played lacrosse I might do that in the spring. Dylan showed me how to catch and strike," Brooke said as she followed her to the front door.

When Tracy opened the door, she didn't find another florist delivery man but the person she had been speaking of just moments earlier, her former daughter in law. "Hello, Lois, this is a pleasant surprise."

Lois's expression seemed to reveal she didn't exactly agree but she didn't say anything as Kristina pushed past her and ran into the house.

"Grandma!" Kristina cried happily as she dove into Tracy's arms.

Tracy met Lois's eyes above Kristina's head. "Why don't you come in? Your daughter is beating me at Scrabble."

"Mommy doesn't let us play Scrabble because Molly likes to eat the letters," Kristina said.

"Well, maybe Brooke would be kind enough to put the Scrabble board out of almost two-year-old reach then."

Brooke turned to go back into the living room without comment or, Tracy noted, actually addressing her mother. For years when people had asked, she told them she had three granddaughters. Occasionally she even showed them pictures of Brooke that Brenda had smuggled her. But if she thought too much about her response it was just painful. For years she had, had three granddaughters but there was one she would never hold, one she was afraid she would never hold again, and one that many people would claim wasn't really hers.

She hadn't dug her heels in to remain in Kristina's life because she hoped it would give her leverage with Sonny to convince Lois to let them see Brooke. She had done it because Kristina seemed like a little girl swirling in a storm unsure who to cling to. She had no doubt that Alexis loved her daughter but Ned had truly been the one who raised her. Ned had been a wonderful father, just like he had been with Brooke Lynn. Then, just like with Lois, he had been willing to accept that he no longer had any place in his daughter's life when Alexis told him as much. Tracy hadn't been able to accept that, and while she had almost accepted that perhaps it was too late to change anything for Brooke Lynn she had been unable to let another little girl grow up unaware of how loved she had been and always would be. The fact that Kristina hadn't actually inherited any of the Quartermaine DNA had been largely immaterial.

Remaining Kristina's Grandma hadn't always been easy, but fortunately Alexis had realized how much Kristina needed them so legal action hadn't been necessary. Interestingly when she had mentioned to Ned that she would pursue that if it came to that he hadn't said anything. When she had suggested the same thing with Brooke Lynn years earlier, he had sworn he would never speak to her again if she ever tried it. That had been more than a little bit of a deterrent. Yet, often Tracy had wondered if she had failed her son more by not going against his wishes than anything else. Once Lois had brought Brooke home the prior spring she had tried to let go of those thoughts and focus on getting reacquainted with her twelve-year-old granddaughter.

"Will you make us hot cocoa?" Mommy can't make it because she can't boil water and daddy is always complaining it has too much sugar," Kristina asked.

"Molly is too young to have chocolate," Lois said pointedly as she picked Molly up from the floor.

"But I wanted hot cocoa," Kristina whined.

"How about hot apple cider with snicker doodles instead?" Tracy suggested.

"What are snicker doodles?" Kristina asked.

"Brookie's favorite cookie, besides Oreos. Except no one makes them the way Mrs. Verdillo did," Lois said.

Kristina's lower lip protruded into the classic Cassadine pout. "Why didn't you make my favorite cookie?" she asked as Brooke came back into the room.

"Brooke, you should show your mother your English paper. Her teacher wants her to submit it to this writing contest. You really should read it, Lois, I'm sure you'll be very impressed and proud of her. Kristina and Molly can help me get the hot cider ready while you're doing that," Tracy said as she reached for Molly.

"Your paper is here?" Lois asked but she did pass Molly to her.

"We just got them back today and Granny picked me up after cross country practice because dad had to go to Pine Valley for the day. Something about the pharmaceuticals plant ELQ has there. He should be back late tonight and we're going to go pick apples tomorrow because I don't have a cross country meet," Brooke said.

"Well, that's nice," Lois said but she didn't look like she really thought that.

XXXXXXXX

Back in the PCGH Emergency Department, Sonny looked up as the orderly wheeled Alexis's gurney back into the room. "Baldwin had to go, some kind of family emergency. So, umm, I can stay, you know, if you want."

"Kristina needs her inhaler. You know if she doesn't do that before bed, she might have an asthma attack in the night and die," Alexis said.

Sonny didn't really think the situation was as grim as Alexis made it out to be. But maybe he would be more terrified for Kristina's life if he had watched her fight for it when she had been first born. He hadn't realized she was his then so he hadn't. He supposed he had that in common with Baldwin. He hadn't been planning on letting Kristina go without her inhaler though. "Well, Bruno is already on his way to pick up the inhaler so you don't have to worry about that."

Alexis did look worried though. "What if Lois doesn't know how to do it right and Kristina doesn't get the medicine all the way into her lungs."

"Brooke had one of those in first grade I think Lois can handle it," Sonny said.

"Brooke has asthma?"

"They thought she did but then once they got rid of all the mold in her school she did a lot better so maybe it wasn't really that."

"Why would her mother send her to a school with mold?"

"Let's get one thing straight, Lois is a good mother and if she had known that there was mold in the school obviously, she wouldn't have sent her there. It's not like it was obvious there were spores in the vents or something."

"Fine, but if you marry Lois, she will not be raising my daughters."

 _She thought he was interested in Lois? What?_ Sonny shuddered a little at that thought. _It was practically incest. It would be like her and Stefan. Well, he had heard rumors about that but he had never believed them._ "Lois is like a sister to me. I'm not planning on dating or marrying her ever. Kristina and Molly are our daughters and I will never keep their mother from their lives," he finally said.

He wouldn't. He had, had his chance to take full custody of Kristina and it had been tempting, she had been almost four then and she barely knew him. There was only so much that could happen with a few dinners at his house a week. Plus, there was the whole Ric issue, he didn't want Ric anywhere near his daughter. But when it came down to it, he hadn't been able to take Kristina from her mother. He knew he would never be able to. What he wasn't quite brave enough to spell out to Alexis was that it wasn't just Lois he didn't want to marry. There really wasn't anyone he wanted to marry except for her.

"If something happens to me, I want you to take Molly too. The girls should be together. I asked Lauren to draw up papers for me to sign. I'll have her messenger you a copy. I'm sure Trevor will challenge it. But he won't get to Molly, even over my dead body. I'm trusting you to protect her."

Sonny's heart lurched. That hadn't been the response he had been expecting. "You know I would do anything for our daughters," he said. He would and the fact that she was finally acknowledging that to him gave him hope. "I would do anything for their mother too," he said as he laid his hand over hers.

Alexis didn't say anything but she didn't pull her hand away. She gave him half of a smile but still didn't speak.

Sonny realized she had said she asked Lauren to draw up papers. He doubted she had called her from the ER so it was probably something she had done earlier in the week. He recalled how upset she had been the day before and realized she must have known she was sick before passing out at work. "You asked Lauren to draw up papers for you?"

"Yes, was that not ok? I realize you have her on retainer and speed dial for your custody crises but she does still have a private practice and other clients," Alexis retorted.

"It's fine. I was just surprised."

"Well, it wasn't like I was going to ask Jordan Baines."

No Sonny didn't think she would do that. Jordan had represented him in his first two custody battles with Carly. During the first one Alexis had represented Carly and before the second one Jordan had helped him file against Alexis for custody of Kristina. Jordan had planned to represent him in his third custody battle with Carly but he had hired Lauren Saylor instead. "It's really fine, Lex, and I'm honored but I'm also not going to let you give up here."

"I'm just being realistic. You know if I don't take care of all of the legalese Trevor will be after Molly. I'm not sure that wouldn't be worse than Ric raising her by himself and you know we would have never let that happen."

She was right. Just as he hadn't been able to take Kristina from her mother, he would have never let Ric take Molly from her mother. It hadn't come to that because Ric was arrested a few months after their September 2006 divorce and then fled to Canada to avoid prosecution. In theory he had died there, although Sonny had more than a few doubts about that. He liked that she had used the word we, that she could acknowledge that at least sometimes they made a pretty good team. If she could just keep remembering that maybe there really was hope.

"Sometimes we don't make such a bad team. We made Kristina. Tell me what is really going on, let me help you, Lex," Sonny said as another African American nurse appeared in the doorway. Unlike the woman who had been in the room before she looked familiar. She also did not look happy. Actually, he believed the word Alexis would probably use would be irate. But then he and Epiphany went way back and he wasn't sure he had ever seen her happy. Eventually she would grasp that her son, Stan, was an adult and if he chose to become an IT specialist for Corinthos-Morgan rather than the doctor or lawyer she had envisioned as the ideal career path for him, well, that was life and shooting daggers in his boss's direction every time they crossed paths really wasn't going to change much. Or he told himself that, he wasn't sure if he actually believed it.

"Now, Mr. Corinthos, I may have to take a triage shift in the ER in a pinch but I don't have let those felons you have in your employ wreak havoc on my waiting area while I do that. I'm giving you five minutes to handle this and then I'm not calling hospital security I'm calling the PCPD myself!" Epiphany ranted.

 _Yeah so Bruno isn't much better with timing than he is with car seats or playpens,_ Sonny decided as Epiphany stalked off. There was a reason Bruno hadn't been fired, although he couldn't recall exactly what that reason had been. He made a mental note to check with Jason about that on Monday. "That's probably just Bruno coming to get Kristina's inhaler and Epiphany overreacting. Don't go anywhere I'll be right back," Sonny said. He stood, gently brushed his lips across her forehead, and then slipped from the room.

XXXXXXXX

After Sonny left the room, Alexis wondered if she really could do that. She had planned to make it seem like she was just randomly putting her affairs in order. Explaining it all to Sonny was more than she could face, at least in the moment, and maybe ever. She was still contemplating all of that when Dr. Scanlon stepped back into the room.

"So, the good news is that the Chest CT is negative, so no blood clots in your lungs," Dr. Scanlon said.

"So, does that mean I can go?"

"Although the head CT was normal, I think clinically you definitely sustained a concussion with your fall so an observation admission overnight would be the prudent thing to do. I think Dr. Quartermaine would be willing to take care of that when she gets done in the cath lab."

"I've had concussions before, they haven't required admission," Alexis protested.

"Is there someone you could stay with then? You really need someone to wake you up during the night," Dr. Scanlon said.

"She can stay with me," Sonny volunteered as he came back into the room.

Alexis struggled to take a breath as she tried to decide whether spending the night in the hospital or with Sonny was the worse option.

"Well, if you're willing to do that I'll get your discharge paperwork together with some good head injury instructions. Central scheduling will make you appointments for follow-up with Dr. Thornhart for the pulmonary function testing and with Dr. Quartermaine. You should make your own appointment with your internist to follow-up the other issues we discussed earlier," Dr. Scanlon said.

"What did he mean about what you discussed earlier?" Sonny asked.

"I can't discuss this here," Alexis said. She couldn't. However, she wasn't sure if she could discuss it anywhere.

 ** _*In case anyone is curious about Scott's family crisis:_**

 ** _His nephew's wife is having an emergency cesarean about ten weeks before her due date. His interventional cardiologist sister, Monica, is stuck in the cath lab with her misogynistic patient from Chapter 9. His trauma surgeon brother in law, Alan, is in an OR somewhere dealing with one of the victims of the multiple vehicle collision on the highway mentioned in Chapter 11, and his niece, Emily, is on call in the NICU, so, someone has to go support AJ through this (especially since Edward is already en route to the hospital thinking he will do that). None of that will appear in this story except possibly to be mentioned in passing conversation, but just in case anyone was curious.*_**

 ** _*The presumption has always been that Sonny is a good father and that should excuse his other faults(and to be fair in the context of GH, in spite of him rarely sharing scenes with his kids, he may be one of the most involved parents). However, even when I watched GH, I don't recall really seeing much evidence of that actually play out on screen so I'm not sure if my take on Sonny's approach to fatherhood is accurate or not but it works for this piece so I'm going with it. Much of his parenting style is probably modeled after Carmine Cerullo (who was probably the closest thing Sonny had to a father growing up). I have probably made Sonny's relationship to the Cerullo's a little closer than canon I don't think he actually officially moved in with them in the history Lois originally recounted to Brenda but he stayed with them a lot when he couldn't handle things at home so maybe it was almost the same thing I just formalized the relationship some. This works better for strengthening Sonny's bond to Lois and makes some of his approach to Ned and Lois's divorce explained as just being a protective older brother which I think perhaps makes it easier to pull off civility between Ned and Sonny in the future if Ned and Lois are doing better. I think it also supports Sonny's motivation to raise Michael and to be Molly's father as understanding that they need him the way he needed Carmine Cerullo.*_**


End file.
